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The society where you are living has got some surplus funds. They are considering two options. One is to build a kids area and second one is to construct a swimming pool.Choose the option that you prefer. Why do you prefer your choice?

The society where you are living has got some surplus funds. They are considering two options. One is to build a kids area and second one is to construct a swimming pool. Choose the option that you prefer. Why do you prefer your choice? eKxPW
While I do see the benefits of constructing a kids area in the vicinity, in my opinion, a swimming pool would be more beneficial as all the citizens would become more gregarious and would also become healthy. At the onset, the majority of individuals would get a chance to be socially active and the convenience of a swimming pool in the locality would eliminate the generation gap. To elucidate, people of all age groups would lure by the amenity of the swimming pool which as a consequence would work as a nexus in the bonding of locals. Therefore, constructing a swimming pool in the neighborhood would be prolific for cementing strong relationships within a particular society. Another point to consider is, a swimming pool in the area of reach would elevate the natives to be healthy and they can acquire a great deal of mental relief by relaxing especially in lukewarm water. Hence, the natives would be more alive and kicking towards their daily life activities. For an epitome, a community housing ‘Progressive Enclave’ confessed that more than half of the people of society get fit as a fiddle after acquiring the convenience of a swimming pool in their area. Whilst I agree that a kids area is advantageous for the toddlers, I believe a swimming pool would be more favorable as it would not only offer a chance to every resident to get benefits but would also lend a hand to be more thriving in the wake of being fit.
While I do
see
the benefits of constructing a
kids
area in the vicinity, in my opinion, a swimming
pool
would be more beneficial as all the citizens would become more gregarious and would
also
become healthy.

At the onset, the majority of individuals would
get
a chance to be
socially
active and the convenience of a swimming
pool
in the locality would eliminate the generation gap. To elucidate,
people
of all age groups would lure by the amenity of the swimming
pool
which as a consequence would work as a nexus in the bonding of locals.
Therefore
, constructing a swimming
pool
in the neighborhood would be prolific for cementing strong relationships within a particular society.

Another point to consider is, a swimming
pool
in the area of reach would elevate the natives to be
healthy and
they can acquire a great deal of mental relief by relaxing
especially
in lukewarm water.
Hence
, the natives would be more alive and kicking towards their daily life activities. For an epitome, a community housing ‘Progressive Enclave’ confessed that more than half of the
people
of society
get
fit as a fiddle after acquiring the convenience of a swimming
pool
in their area.

Whilst I
agree
that a
kids
area is advantageous for the toddlers, I believe a swimming
pool
would be more favorable as it would not
only
offer a chance to every resident to
get
benefits
but
would
also
lend a hand to be more thriving in the wake of
being fit
.
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IELTS essay The society where you are living has got some surplus funds. They are considering two options. One is to build a kids area and second one is to construct a swimming pool. Choose the option that you prefer. Why do you prefer your choice?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
251 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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