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Write a paragraph of 150 words starting with the following sentence: "It is believed that a man who knows how to divide his time between work and leisure enjoys happiness."

Write a paragraph of 150 words starting with the following sentence: "It is believed that a man who knows how to divide his time between work and leisure enjoys happiness. " mbNlO
It is believed that a man who knows how to divide his time between work and leisure enjoys happiness. It is undeniable that work plays an important role in our lives for two main reasons: firstly, permanent job can give us a good income to cover a number of expensive expenses and feed ourselves; secondly, a sense of purpose is what you feel when work goes smoothly, auspiciously. Nevertheless, leisure is also of tremendous value. Body needs time to rest and recuperate from the stress of work to avoid exhaustion and keeps us mentally and physically healthy. Interestingly, when reflecting on their lives, people often express their regrets about the youth and complain about being so drawn into working and pursuing their careers. In general, they realized that they had missed out on valuable experiences that they may never get back. Alternatively, about the same number of people would also feel remorseful about spending too much time on leisure activities and having too little involvement in own work and career. To conclude, a balance between work and leisure is essential; people will feel more content and live a desirable life.
It
is believed
that a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
who knows how to divide his time between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leisure
enjoys happiness. It is undeniable that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
plays an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
for two main reasons:
firstly
, permanent job can give us a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
income to cover a number of expensive expenses and feed ourselves;
secondly
, a sense of purpose is what you feel when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
goes
smoothly
,
auspiciously
.
Nevertheless
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leisure
is
also
of tremendous value. Body needs time to rest and recuperate from the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
to avoid exhaustion and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keeps
us mentally and
physically
healthy.
Interestingly
, when reflecting on their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
express their regrets about the youth and complain about being
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
drawn into working and pursuing their careers.
In general
, they realized that they had missed out on valuable experiences that they may never
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
back.
Alternatively
, about the same number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
would
also
feel remorseful about spending too much time on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leisure
activities and having too
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
involvement in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and career.
To conclude
, a balance between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leisure
is essential;
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
will feel more content and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
a desirable life.
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IELTS essay Write a paragraph of 150 words starting with the following sentence: "It is believed that a man who knows how to divide his time between work and leisure enjoys happiness. "

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
190 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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