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write a paragraph about your favorite leisure activity

write a paragraph about your favorite leisure activity pbEea
My favorite leisure activity is listening to music. Most of the time, I listen to music with my headphones. When no one is home, I turn on the speakers to have the best experiences with music. This activity is extremely useful and interesting. First, it helps me relax after school. Second, I can learn numerous new words and increase my vocabulary merely by listening to foreign songs. Also, whenever I feel sad or angry, listening to the right songs improves my moods.
My favorite leisure activity is listening to music. Most of the time, I listen to music with my headphones. When no one is home, I turn on the speakers to have the best experiences with music. This activity is
extremely
useful and interesting.
First
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
me relax after school. Second, I can learn numerous new words and increase my vocabulary
merely
by listening to foreign songs.
Also
, whenever I feel sad or angry, listening to the right songs
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improves
my moods.
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IELTS essay write a paragraph about your favorite leisure activity

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
82 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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