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WRITE A PARAGRAPH (120-150 WORD) ABOUT YOUR HOME TOWN OR YOUR VILLAGE

WRITE A PARAGRAPH (120-150 WORD) ABOUT YOUR HOME TOWN OR YOUR VILLAGE G95ye
My hometown is HaiPhong, which is 102km to the Northeast from HaNoi Capital. This is the third largest city of VietNam and plays an important role in the social economic development of VietNam, so it has a lot of high-rise apartments, shopping malls that provide a full range of shopping, food and entertainment services. In addition, HaiPhong is also famous for DoSon peninsula, which is surrounded by water on three sides, casino and golf course at DoSon, CatBa national park, HonDau island. In HaiPhong there are less traffic jams so people mainly use private vehicles such as: bike, motobike or car. I don’t mind cycling to school because there are lots of good cycle lanes in my city. However, they can use public transport like bus to travel because they are busy or they do not have their own vehicle but not popular. If you visit my hometown, you must be careful when driving in our city as there are a lot of one-way streets. I like my hometown because I was born and raised in there. It holds a lot of memories about my family and my friends. HaiPhong is a good place for live because people in there are very gentle, kind and friendly. If you interact with them, you will feel the harmony and joy. I love HaiPhong so much and I hope one day I can do somethings just to contribute to development of my hometown.
My
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hometown
is
Possible spelling mistake found.
HaiPhong
, which is
Insert a space between the numerical value and the unit symbol "102 km"
102km
to the Northeast from
Possible spelling mistake found.
HaNoi
Capital. This is the third largest city of
Possible spelling mistake found.
VietNam
and plays an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in the social economic development of
Possible spelling mistake found.
VietNam
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it has a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of high-rise apartments, shopping malls that provide a full range of shopping, food and entertainment services.
In addition
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
HaiPhong
is
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
for
Possible spelling mistake found.
DoSon
peninsula, which
is surrounded
by water on three sides, casino and golf course at
Possible spelling mistake found.
DoSon
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
CatBa
national park,
Possible spelling mistake found.
HonDau
island.

In
Possible spelling mistake found.
HaiPhong
there are less traffic jams
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
mainly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
private vehicles such as: bike,
Possible spelling mistake found.
motobike
or car. I don’t mind cycling to school
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
there are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lots
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
cycle lanes in my city.
However
, they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
public transport like bus to travel
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they are
Use a comma before 'or' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
busy or
they do not have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
vehicle
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not popular. If you visit my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hometown
, you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be careful when driving in our city as there are a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of one-way streets.

I like my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hometown
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
I
was born
and raised in there. It holds a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of memories about my family and my friends.
Possible spelling mistake found.
HaiPhong
is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
place for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
gentle, kind and
Possible agreement error. Did you mean "friendlies"?
friendly
. If you interact with them, you will feel the harmony and joy. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
Possible spelling mistake found.
HaiPhong
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
much and I hope one day I can do somethings
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
to contribute to development of my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hometown
.
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Learn everything you can, anytime you can, from anyone you can; there will always come a time when you will be grateful you did.
Sarah Caldwell

IELTS essay WRITE A PARAGRAPH (120-150 WORD) ABOUT YOUR HOME TOWN OR YOUR VILLAGE

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
240 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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