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write a narrative paragraph about the most memorable encounter you had with a stranger.

write a narrative paragraph about the most memorable encounter you had with a stranger. 9wM0n
Around April of last year, I was helped by a girl on my way to school. This was the most memorable encounter I had with a stranger. When I was on my way to school by motorbike. I had a traffic accident. At that time, I didn't see anyone around while my smartphone battery was dead and I was desperate. Then I saw a girl and she was walking towards me. Even though there was no one, she was fearless and still helping me. She helped me call my family and called an ambulance to take me to the hospital. Thanks to her, I was safe. She is a good person and I will never forget her figure.
Around April of last year, I was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
by a girl on my way to school. This was the most memorable encounter I had with a stranger.
“When” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
When
I was on my way to school by motorbike. I had a traffic accident. At that time, I didn't
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
anyone around while my smartphone battery was
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
dead and
I was desperate. Then I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
a
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
girl and
she was walking towards me.
Even though
there was no one, she was fearless and
still
helping me. She
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
me call my family and called an ambulance to take me to the hospital. Thanks to her, I was safe. She is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
person and I will never forget her figure.
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IELTS essay write a narrative paragraph about the most memorable encounter you had with a stranger.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
118 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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