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World history suggests that violence and conflict were more evident under male leadership than under female leadership. So, for peace to prevail, female leadership can be considered as a better option than male leadership. To what extent do you agree or di v.3

World history suggests that violence and conflict were more evident under male leadership than under female leadership. So, for peace to prevail, female leadership can be considered as a better option than male leadership. 3
Teaching is a revered profession around the world. Sadly, it is also one of the most underpaid jobs compared to others. Many teachers around the world are struggling to earn a decent income. In my opinion, compensating teachers depending upon the grasping ability of their respective students is not a best method. Teachers are people who strive with the best abilities to make their students have an overall exposure towards the subject they are teaching. It often requires the teacher to be well organized beforehand. This includes activities like preparing notes by skimming the text books and visiting a library for additional information. Moreover, it requires vast knowledge of various miscellaneous topics. In a recent article, which is published in the Herald newspaper, teachers shared their personal accounts on how they work towards enhancing their skills, in order to be competent in the market. On the contrary, to their hard work, the majority of teachers receive a meagre wage for their work which is not reasonable. Most of the times parents show interest in enrolling their children in schools which are having competent teachers as their staff. Many people argue that if the teaching methods are efficient, the students will eventually show interest at some point of time. In turn, it leads to a notion that teaching abilities are the deciding factor in their respective salaries. In a survey conducted by The Education Department of India, the salaries are 30% higher for teachers who are famous for making students pass the exams with good scores, rather than their counterparts. To conclude, in my opinion, it is compulsory that the government makes sure the pay scale of teachers should not be leveraged by the success of their students. The learning abilities of students should not be a measuring scale for the salary which a teacher receives.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Teaching
is a revered profession around the world.
Sadly
, it is
also
one of the most underpaid jobs compared to others.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
around the world are struggling to earn a decent income. In my opinion, compensating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
depending upon the grasping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ability
of their respective
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
is not
Use "the" with the superlative.
a
best method.

Teachers are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who strive with the best
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
abilities
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
have an
overall
exposure towards the subject they are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teaching
. It
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
requires the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teacher
to be well organized beforehand. This includes activities like preparing notes by skimming the text books and visiting a library for additional information.
Moreover
, it requires vast knowledge of various miscellaneous topics. In a recent article, which
is published
in the Herald newspaper,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
shared their personal accounts on how they work towards enhancing their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
, in order to be competent in the market.
On the contrary
, to their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
work, the majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
receive a
Possible spelling mistake. 'meagre' is British English.
meagre
wage for their work which is not reasonable.

Consider using "most of the time" if you mean "usually" or "very often".
Most of the times
parents
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
interest in enrolling their children in schools which are having competent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
as their staff.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
argue that if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teaching
methods are efficient, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
will
eventually
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
interest at
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
point of time. In turn, it leads to a notion that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teaching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
abilities
are the deciding factor in their respective salaries. In a survey conducted by The Education Department of India, the salaries are 30% higher for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
who are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
for making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
pass the exams with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
scores,
rather
than their counterparts.

To conclude
, in my opinion, it is compulsory that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
sure the pay scale of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
should not
be leveraged
by the success of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
. The learning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
abilities
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should not be a measuring scale for the salary which a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teacher
receives.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay World history suggests that violence and conflict were more evident under male leadership than under female leadership. So, for peace to prevail, female leadership can be considered as a better option than male leadership. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
305 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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