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Working at home with a computer and a phone is better than working at a company’s office using the same equipment.

Working at home with a computer and a phone is better than working at a company’s office using the same equipment. B739V
As the saying goes, “one man’s meat is another’s poison. ” That is, everyone has different preferences. While some people prefer to work at home with a computer and a phone, others believe that working at a company’s office using the same equipment is better. As for me, I strongly argue that working at a company’s office is better. First of all, I care about efficiency, and working at a company’s office can save more time. (1) For example, when I worked in an accounting firm, I often encountered some difficulties that I could not handle. (2) Therefore, I would ask my colleague or senior for help. All I needed to do was to take a step to their table and find the answer, an action that only took me five minutes. (4) On the other hand, if I worked at home, (5) I must spend a quality amount of time calling my senior for help. What’s worse, they sometimes did not see the phone calls. (6) Apparently, working at home requires more time to finish tasks. Secondly, I am easily distracted, but working at home with a computer and a phone did not allow me to concentrate on the work. (1) For instance, when I worked from home during the covid-19 pandemic, (2) I could not really focus on my work. In other words, the noise of my kids and the disturbance of my pet would absolutely annoy me. Besides, because my boss could not supervise me, I would often watch the NBA games while I was still working. (3) Therefore, I could not focus on my tasks at all and get distracted by such interferences. Last but not least, I put emphasis on social network, and working at a company’s office can maintain the relationship. (1) Take me as an example. When I worked in the company, (2) my colleague and I usually ate in the fancy restaurant after work. We could gossip about many topics and share our daily lives. Besides, we could also chat with each other during the break. In other words, we had a lot of opportunities to bond with together. (3) As a result, working at the office helps me build up the relationship with my colleague. In conclusion, I strongly contend that working at a company’s office is fantastic. After all, I am concerned about efficiency and social network. Moreover, I am easily distracted at home.
As the saying goes, “one
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
’s meat is another’s poison. ”
That is
, everyone has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
preferences. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
prefer to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
at home with a computer and a phone, others believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
at a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
office
using the same equipment is better. As for me, I
strongly
argue that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
at a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
office
is better.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, I care about efficiency, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
at a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
office
can save more time. (1)
For example
, when I worked in an accounting firm, I
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
encountered
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
difficulties that I could not handle. (2)
Therefore
, I would ask my colleague or senior for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
. All I needed to do was to take a step to their table and find the answer, an action that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
took me five minutes. (4) On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, if I worked at home, (5) I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
spend a quality amount of time calling my senior for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
. What’s worse, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
did not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the phone calls. (6)
Apparently
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
at home requires more time to finish tasks.

Secondly
, I am
easily
distracted,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
at home with a computer and a phone did not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
me to concentrate on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
. (1)
For instance
, when I worked from home during the
Did you mean "COVID-19" or the alternative spelling "Covid-19" (= coronavirus)?
covid-19
pandemic, (2) I could not
really
focus on my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
words, the noise of my kids and the disturbance of my pet would
absolutely
annoy me.
Besides
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
my boss could not supervise me, I would
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
the NBA games while I was
still
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
. (3)
Therefore
, I could not focus on my tasks at all and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
distracted by such interferences.

Last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not least, I put emphasis on social network, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
at a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
office
can maintain the relationship. (1) Take me as an example. When I worked in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company
, (2) my colleague and I
usually
ate in the fancy restaurant after
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
. We could gossip about
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
topics and share our daily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
Besides
, we could
also
chat with each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
during the break. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
words, we had
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
opportunities to bond with together. (3)
As a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
office
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
me build up the relationship with my colleague.

In conclusion
, I
strongly
contend that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
at a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
company’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
office
is fantastic.
After all
, I
am concerned
about efficiency and social network.
Moreover
, I am
easily
distracted at home.
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IELTS essay Working at home with a computer and a phone is better than working at a company’s office using the same equipment.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
404 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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