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With an incredibly population, communicating via the internet and text messaging, face to face communication will become a thing of the past. To what extent do you agree?

With an incredibly population, communicating via the internet and text messaging, face to face communication will become a thing of the past. 56BKm
It is believed that due to the advent of the internet and text messaging services being used by a large proportion of the population, communicating via face to face will soon become extinct. I do not fully agree to this and the reasons will be discussed in this essay. To begin, individuals spend more of their time accessing the internet space for various reasons. For instance, recently, there has been an upsurge of online jobs, that is, jobs that are done via the internet. This has led to a wider reach of potential clients and customers as the internet grants access to a lot of individuals at the same time. Also, more recently, for example, during the COVID-19 pandemic, it can be recalled how valuable the internet was as companies had staff working from home. Moreover, due to restricted movements throughout the span of the lockdown, text messaging and internet services were essential as they helped communication between individuals over long distances. On the other hand, face to face interaction will not go away anytime soon because it allows for a better exchange of information since bother speaker and listener are able to see and interpret body language and facial expressions. This builds stronger relationships, enhances credibility and trust. In conclusion, I do not believe that face to face communication will be over-run by the online communication. They are modes of reaching of reaching out to a number of people with a plethora of benefits in the world today if harnessed properly.
It
is believed
that due to the advent of the internet and text messaging services being
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
by a large proportion of the population, communicating via
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
will
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
become extinct. I do not
fully
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
to this and the reasons will
be discussed
in this essay.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
, individuals spend more of their time accessing the internet space for various reasons.
For instance
, recently, there has been an upsurge of online jobs,
that is
, jobs that
are done
via the internet. This has led to a wider reach of potential clients and customers as the internet grants access to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
individuals at the same time.

Also
, more recently,
for example
, during the COVID-19 pandemic, it can
be recalled
how valuable the internet was as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
had staff working from home.
Moreover
, due to restricted movements throughout the span of the lockdown, text messaging and internet services were essential as they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
communication between individuals over long distances.

On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
interaction will not go away anytime
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
for a better exchange of information since bother speaker and listener are able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
and interpret body language and facial expressions. This builds stronger relationships, enhances credibility and trust.

In conclusion
, I do not believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
communication will be over-run by the online communication. They are modes
This phrase is duplicated. You should probably leave only "of reaching".
of reaching of reaching
out to a number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
with a plethora of benefits in the world
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
if harnessed
properly
.

IELTS essay With an incredibly population, communicating via the internet and text messaging, face to face communication will become a thing of the past.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
252 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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