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Why you are a good candidate for this program

Why you are a good candidate for this program DaApj
I am a dynamic and highly motivated individual with over ten years of blended exposure to business and marketing. The Background I have had the privilege of working in some of the leading global retail stores and retail e-commerce ventures. I also gained a great deal of knowledge on the job and participated in world-class training programs offered by employers and retail partners. Although I acquired a vast amount of practical knowledge, the only thing I regretted during those days was not having a suitable academic qualification. I managed to obtain diplomas in business administration and marketing, but to achieve my personal and professional goals, I needed a well-recognized academic qualification. I started exploring study opportunities and found that the higher education system in Sweden meets my requirements. I referred to all the necessary details and did my course selections carefully. Why I Selected Bachelor Program in Retail Management? I selected this program after evaluating all the required details. I referred to the program fact sheet and found that all the subjects are my favorites. The entire program is methodically structured to produce competent graduates. This program opens up ample opportunities which are in demand in my country and in the global context as well. The program is linked to the Center for Retailing, which sets out to provide world-class research. The program helps to connect and collaborate with prominent players and brands in the retail industry. I have a great interest in sustainability and digitalization. I noticed that this program has more focus on those areas. There are many other factors too. Why SSE? There were many factors that influenced me to choose the Stockholm School of Economics as well. I will list down a few. I found only one quality program in retail management and that is only offered by SSE. The business school of SSE has a good reputation internationally and is one the prominent schools in Europe. I noticed that SSE ranked highest in student satisfaction and focused highly on student employability. The university extends great support to students and has a great student culture. I highly believe in collaboration than competition. I have also seen an active student union and their wide range of activities. I am excited to be a part of SASSE and add value through synergy. Why Me? As I outlined above, I have good reasons to enroll in this program. I am also confident that I will be able to complete this course with flying colors while reaching my personal goals and adding pride to the university as well. I am certain that I will be your best pick. Looking forward to hearing from you soon.
I am a dynamic and
highly
motivated individual with over ten years of blended exposure to business and marketing.

The Background

I have had the privilege of working in
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
leading global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
retail
stores and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
retail
e-commerce ventures. I
also
gained a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
great
deal of knowledge on the job and participated in world-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
training
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
programs
offered by employers and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
retail
partners.

Although I acquired a vast amount of practical knowledge, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
thing I regretted during those days was not having a suitable academic qualification. I managed to obtain diplomas in business administration and marketing,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
to achieve my personal and professional goals, I needed a well-recognized academic qualification.

I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
exploring study opportunities and found that the higher education system in Sweden meets my requirements.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
referred to all the necessary
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
and did my course selections
carefully
.

Why I Selected Bachelor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Program
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Retail
Management?

I selected this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
program
after evaluating all the required
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
.

I referred to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
program
fact sheet and found that all the subjects are my favorites.

The entire
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
program
is
methodically
structured to produce competent graduates.

This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
program
opens up ample opportunities which are in demand in my country and in the global context
as well
.

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
program
is linked
to the Center for Retailing, which sets out to provide world-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
research.

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
program
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to connect and collaborate with prominent players and brands in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
retail
industry.

I have a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
great
interest in sustainability and digitalization. I noticed that this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
program
has more focus on those areas.

There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
other factors too.

Why SSE?

There were
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
factors that influenced me to choose the Stockholm School of Economics
as well
. I will list down a few.

I found
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
one quality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
program
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
retail
management and
that is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
offered by SSE.

The business school of SSE has a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
reputation
internationally
and is
Did you mean "one of"?
one
the prominent schools in Europe.

I noticed that SSE ranked highest in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
satisfaction and focused
highly
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
employability.

The university extends
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
great
support to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
and has a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
great
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
culture. I
highly
believe in collaboration than competition.

I have
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
an active
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
union and their wide range of activities.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
am excited
to be a part of
Possible spelling mistake found.
SASSE
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
value through synergy.

Why Me?

As I outlined above, I have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
reasons to enroll in this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
program
. I am
also
confident that I will be able to complete this course with flying colors while reaching my personal goals and adding pride to the university
as well
.

I am certain that I will be your best pick. Looking forward to hearing from you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
.
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IELTS essay Why you are a good candidate for this program

Essay
  American English
23 paragraphs
445 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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