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Why the road increase traffic?

Why the road increase traffic? Nl12j
Traffic is one of the big problems of most mega cities in the world because of some reasons. First, large roads have encouraged people to drive more. In fact, as big cities such as capital or industry center, the authorities have built roads as large as possible due to the huge of transportation. For example, people usually go to work, and they need to have a transport. As the road is wider, people tend to buy more car. Second, empty space on the roads have been used for public places. In particular, in my country, there are many people who sale the stuffs such as foods, souvenirs, clothes, etc. on the roads. Therefore, a part of these roads has been taken for years by personal business. Consequently, nowadays, road surface is narrower than the past. In addition, the government have added parking lots on these streets since the number of the car have increased for years. In conclusion, roads have increased traffic jam since many years for two above reasons. If the authorities do not have the effective solutions, this problem will be more serious in the future.
Traffic is one of the
big
problems of most mega cities in the world
because
of
some
reasons.
First
, large
roads
have encouraged
people
to drive more. In fact, as
big
cities such as capital or industry center, the authorities have built
roads
as large as possible due to
the huge of
transportation.
For example
,
people
usually
go to work, and they need to have
a transport
. As the
road
is wider,
people
tend to
buy
more car. Second, empty space on the
roads
have been
used
for public places.
In particular
, in my country, there are
many
people
who sale the stuffs such as foods, souvenirs, clothes, etc. on the
roads
.
Therefore
, a part of these
roads
has
been taken
for years by personal business.
Consequently
, nowadays,
road
surface is narrower than the past.
In addition
, the
government
have
added
parking lots on these streets since the number of the car have increased for years.
In conclusion
,
roads
have increased traffic jam since
many
years for two above reasons. If the authorities do not have the effective solutions, this problem will be more serious in the future.
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IELTS essay Why the road increase traffic?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
188 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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