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why go to university? explain your reason.

why go to university? explain your reason. 7P7KY
There is a lot of reasons that persuade or motivate people to attend university. First of all, we give a couple of reasons that why people enter the university and then we mention some wrong attitudes and opinions about this issue. Nowadays, attending the university is a compulsion for almost every people inhabit the modern and big cities. Population increase is a serious problem we are facing with, and as a result, unemployment increases. So we must improve our knowledge and prepare ourselves for a suitable career by education. University gives this opportunity to devise novel careers by utilizing novel sciences. To support my opinion, I give an example. I am graduated from university in the field of chemistry. I loved this major and my background knowledge from high school was so tiny, but I enhance my information and knowledge in chemistry by education at university. Also, I prepared myself for my future job in this field. Hens, attending university can equip students for their professional future job. There is a lot of old-fashioned attitudes about entering the university. For example, some parents force their children for higher education, while they are not interested and it turns in to compulsion. There is no doubt that our society needs useful people and various careers, but there is no compulsion that all people must get higher education, because we require academic careers and experimental jobs same as the professional ones. Thereupon, going to university is totally optional. To sum up, attending to university is a perfect choice to get ready for a career and expanding knowledge but we need experimental careers the same, and we can gain this ability by another way. So, the main point is that all depends on one’s ability, tact and favorites.
There is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
reasons that persuade or motivate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to attend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, we give a couple of reasons that why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
enter the
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
university and
then we mention
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
attitudes and opinions about this issue.

Nowadays, attending the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
is a compulsion for almost every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
inhabit the modern and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
cities. Population increase is a serious problem we are facing with, and
as a result
, unemployment increases.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
and prepare ourselves for a suitable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
career
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
University
gives this opportunity to devise novel
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
careers
by utilizing novel sciences.

To support my opinion, I give an example. I
am graduated
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
in the field of chemistry. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
loved
this major and my background
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
from high school was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
tiny,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I enhance my information and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
in chemistry by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
.
Also
, I prepared myself for my future job in this field. Hens, attending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
can equip students for their professional future job.

There is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
-fashioned attitudes about entering the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
.
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
parents force their children for higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
, while they are not interested and it turns in to compulsion. There is no doubt that our society needs useful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
careers
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
there is no compulsion that all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
we require academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
careers
and experimental jobs same as the professional ones. Thereupon, going to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
is
totally
optional.

To sum up, attending to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
is a perfect choice to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
ready for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
career
and expanding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
we need experimental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
careers
the same, and we can gain this ability by another way.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, the main point is that all depends on one’s ability, tact and favorites.

IELTS essay why go to university? explain your reason.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
294 words
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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