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Why do you want to study business and computing

Why do you want to study business and computing l78nQ
We used to think that Plankton was a joke to be dating a computer, but now we have at least one machine that tells us how to live. Never had I thought that technology would play such a significant role in determining my future. The start of the pandemic brought home to me the truth about technology: it connects us. While this realization did not immediately inspire me to dive deeper into the study of technology and its systems, it did give me the sign that studying the intersection of business and technology could be my ikigai. Ikigai is a combination of something that I love; learning, planning, and organization, something that I am good at; think critically and produce creative ideas, something that the world needs; someone who is focused and determined, and something that could be profitable; the knowledge and experiences that I will gain. Although my understanding of technology and its systems is not yet enough for me to take the matter into my own hands, I continue to grasp the concept of something that connects us. As a result, I have been taking a Responsive Web Design course on FreeCodeCamp. From there, I have gained more knowledge about programming and its languages. I also learn and notice that I will need a lot of focus, patience, and determination to study for this course. My experiences as secretary and vice president of the student council in consecutive terms, where I learned to be focused, patient, and persevered when working on projects, prove that I am in the right place. The start of my small online business, where I turned my passion into profits and strengthened my skills in digital marketing, taught me a lot about time management, interpersonal skills, as well as how to manage and organize a business and my transactions data on spreadsheets.
We
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that Plankton was a joke to be dating a computer,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
we have at least one machine that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tells
us how to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
. Never had I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
would play such a significant role in determining my future. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
of the pandemic brought home to me the truth about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
: it connects us. While this realization did not immediately inspire me to dive deeper into the study of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
and its systems, it did give me the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sign
that studying the intersection of business and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
could be my
Possible spelling mistake found.
ikigai
.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Ikigai
is a combination of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
something
that I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
; learning, planning, and organization,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
something
that I am
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
at;
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
critically
and produce creative
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
something
that the world needs; someone who
is focused
and determined, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
something
that could be profitable; the knowledge and experiences that I will gain.

Although my understanding of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
and its systems is not
yet
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
for me to take the matter into my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
hands, I continue to grasp the concept of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
something
that connects us.
As a result
, I have been taking a Responsive Web Design course on
Possible spelling mistake found.
FreeCodeCamp
. From there, I have gained more knowledge about programming and its languages. I
also
learn and notice that I will need
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
focus, patience, and determination to study for this course. My experiences as secretary and vice president of the student council in consecutive terms, where I learned to
be focused
, patient, and persevered when working on projects, prove that I am in the right place. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
of my
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
online business, where I turned my passion into profits and strengthened my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
in digital marketing, taught me a lot about time management, interpersonal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
,
as well
as how to manage and organize a business and my transactions data on spreadsheets.
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IELTS essay Why do you want to study business and computing

Essay
  American English
2 paragraphs
308 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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