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why do students go to university

why do students go to university pbXK3
Students have to develop themselves for living in the best standards. Education is the first requirement of developing. Firstly students have to go primary and high school for deciding a profession which they want. Thus they can prepare themselves for specialization. When students go to a university, they can see that there are a lot of things that they don't know. Going to a university is a big chance to learn what they don't know and to have experience a lot of things. They can meet people from other cultures and nationalities, fşnd new hobbies, develop their communication and present skills, develop theri knowledge in speacial topics. They can earn money more than students who are not graduated from university. Finally, going to university is a requirement for being happier and living in the best standards.
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Students
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
develop themselves for living in the best standards. Education is the
first
requirement of developing.
Firstly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
go primary and high school for deciding a profession which they want.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Thus
they can prepare themselves for specialization. When
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
go to a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
, they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
that there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
things that they don't know. Going to a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
chance to learn what they don't know and to have experience
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
things. They can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
from other cultures and nationalities,
Possible spelling mistake found.
fşnd
new hobbies, develop their communication and present
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
, develop
Possible spelling mistake found.
theri
knowledge in
Possible spelling mistake found.
speacial
topics. They can earn money more than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who are not graduated from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
.
Finally
, going to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
is a requirement for being happier and living in the best standards.
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IELTS essay why do students go to university

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
136 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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