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Having more money and less free time is better than earning less money and having more free time. Discuss both the views.

Having more money and less free time is better than earning less money and having more free time. OElnj
The needs of people differ according to their lifestyle and priorities. Certain ratio of people would prefer money more than free time whereas certain ratio of people prefer having more free time over money. This preference can thus be concluded to be subjective to people. In order to understand both the views, it's important for us to get a brief perspective on each of them. Having more money and less free time is considered to be better amongst people who have the natural tendency to work towards financial freedom. They are ready to sacrifice their free time to gain a stable income. These set of people believe and understand that having money gives you an upper advantage over things and having too much free time could curtail your productivity. Coming to the other side of the spectrum, we can understand that people who chose more free time over money, prioritise their free time. They are happy to spend time with their loved ones or themselves doing things that they love. It is true that leaning towards materialism means compromising on leisure activities and possibly the mental state of wellbeing. Furthermore, free time is important to build a person's personality and aptitude, Constant hustle for money could deteriorate one's health if work-life balance has been compromised. For instance, Investment Bankers earn well but sacrifice their time spent with family. Majority of the investment bankers are said to be depressed due to negligence of mental health. I conclude by saying that both money and free time is equally important. It is therefore crucial to balance both money and free time to live a succesful, content and stressless life.
The needs of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
differ according to their lifestyle and priorities. Certain ratio of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
would prefer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
more than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
whereas certain ratio of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
prefer having more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
over
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
. This preference can
thus
be concluded
to be subjective to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. In order to understand both the views, it's
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for us to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a brief perspective on each of them.

Having more
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money
and less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
is considered
to be better amongst
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who have the natural tendency to work towards financial freedom. They are ready to sacrifice their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to gain a stable income. These set of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe and understand that having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
gives you an upper advantage over things and having too much
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
could curtail your productivity.

Coming to the other side of the spectrum, we can understand that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who chose more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
over
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
,
Possible spelling mistake. 'prioritise' is British English.
prioritise
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
. They are happy to spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
loved
ones or themselves doing things that they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
. It is true that leaning towards materialism means compromising on leisure activities and
possibly
the mental state of
Possible spelling mistake found.
wellbeing
.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to build a person's personality and aptitude, Constant
The singular proper name 'Constant' must be used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "hustles", "hustled".
hustle
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
could deteriorate one's health if work-life balance has
been compromised
.
For instance
, Investment Bankers earn well
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
sacrifice their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
spent with family. Majority of the investment bankers
are said
to
be depressed
due to negligence of mental health.

I conclude by saying that both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
is
equally
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
. It is
therefore
crucial to balance both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
a
Possible spelling mistake found.
succesful
, content and
Possible spelling mistake found.
stressless
life.
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IELTS essay Having more money and less free time is better than earning less money and having more free time.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
276 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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