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why do people want to be famous

why do people want to be famous LLDx3
There are lots of benefit for being a famous person. People think that by being famous they will be recognize and they can get a lot of income from endorsement or advertising a product. By being famous they will have a chance to step up their life and also meet other famous people. Nowadays, there are lots of famous people who have a bad behavior. Their attitude is caused by the factors of fame and richness. Those famous people will look down on the others and because of their own attitude the public will start hating on them.
There are lots of benefit for being a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
famous
person.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that by being
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
famous
they will be
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
recognize and
they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
income from endorsement or advertising a product. By being
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
famous
they will have a chance to step up their life and
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
famous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. Nowadays, there are lots of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
famous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who have a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
behavior. Their attitude
is caused
by the factors of fame and richness. Those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
famous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will look down on the others and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
attitude the public will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
hating on them.
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Oliver Wendell Holmes

IELTS essay why do people want to be famous

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
98 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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