Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Why do people travel? Use examples and reasons to support your argument.

Why do people travel? Use examples and reasons to support your argument. kYEDd
It is true that travelling brings us more expenses, but it is an integral part of everyone’s life. From my viewpoint, the benefits of travelling, including fun, educational materials, and reduction of life stress, are superior to the drawbacks. First, one of the cogent reasons why I support travelling is that it is educational. My experience in this case is instructive and I am willing to express here. I recall clearly the last trip that I had was pertaining to six months ago. I, together with my family, planned to travel Shiraz which is the populous city in the south of Iran. In this trip, I visited the tomb of Hafez, who was the Iranian prominent poet in the eighteenth century. By visiting the tomb, I learned more about his poems, which mostly are lyrics, and biography which I have not ever seen and heard on TV obviously. Consequently, having a trip surely will be effective to boost our knowledge about everything like distinguished figures. Additionally, travelling causes stress of our life to be reduced significantly and also to experience new events. The former case in this paragraph is the main reason to travel. On the other hand, travelling another city or country give us a new opportunity for eating or testing staple foods and drinks of that area. In this case I can say that when I was performing the military service, I was in Kermanshah which is a relatively small city in the north of Iran. In the meanwhile, I got a chance to eat the staple food of Kermanshah city namely Dande Kebab which was a delicious food that I served out of my home town ever since. So, travelling creates a situation for me to have memorable moments in my life. Finally, taking a trip help me to have an enjoyable moments in life. These joys may come from eating traditional foods of that area or learning about the historical background or culture of that city.
It is true that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelling
brings us more expenses,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it is an integral part of everyone’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. From my viewpoint, the benefits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelling
, including fun, educational materials, and reduction of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
, are superior to the drawbacks.

First
, one of the cogent reasons why I support
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelling
is that it is educational. My experience
in this case
is
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
instructive and
I am willing to express here. I recall
clearly
the last
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trip
that I had was pertaining to six months ago. I, together with my family, planned to travel Shiraz which is the populous city in the south of Iran. In this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trip
, I visited the tomb of
Possible spelling mistake found.
Hafez
, who was the Iranian prominent poet in the eighteenth century. By visiting the tomb, I learned more about his poems, which
mostly
are lyrics, and biography which I have not ever
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
and heard on TV
obviously
.
Consequently
, having a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trip
surely
will be effective to boost our knowledge about everything like distinguished figures.

Additionally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelling
causes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
of our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
to be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
significantly
and
also
to experience new
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
. The former case in this paragraph is the main reason to travel.
On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelling
another city or country give us a new opportunity for eating or testing staple
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
and drinks of that area.
In this case
I can say that when I was performing the military service, I was in
Possible spelling mistake found.
Kermanshah
which is a
relatively
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
city in the north of Iran. In the meanwhile, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
a chance to eat the staple
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
of
Possible spelling mistake found.
Kermanshah
city
namely
Possible spelling mistake found.
Dande
Kebab which was a delicious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
that I served out of my home town ever since.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelling
creates a situation for me to have memorable moments in my life.

Finally
, taking a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trip
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
me to have an enjoyable
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "moment"?
moments
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. These joys may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
from eating traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
of that area or learning about the historical background or culture of that city.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay Why do people travel? Use examples and reasons to support your argument.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
330 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts





Get more results for topic:
  • Why do people travel? Use examples and reasons to support your argument.