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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?A university education should include an internship or some type of work experience?Use specific reasons and examples to support your answers.

A university education should include an internship or some type of work experience? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answers. KwqMR
Definitely, I am agreed with the foregoing remark. University’s authorities along with theoretical courses should offer an internship courses. The benefits of this policy are vast, such as preparing students for future job, giving students better job opportunities, and creating more memorable events for them. Some aspects of the arguments are discussed below. The first and compelling reason why I believe that internship courses should be required is that by taking them, educational environments become warm and pleasurable for students. This makes students get interested in going on their education, and in the meanwhile performing internships students can have an in-depth understanding what they have learned theoretically in class. Apart from this aspect, students are able to get to know with new people in workplace during internship. This in turn forms memorable events among us and even we may take a photo from each other. As we look back the old memories, we retell some of them to our children, and perhaps children are honored your parents because of their parents’ achievements. As such, getting through internship is required for students. Another point concerning the internship courses is that these take care of necessary skills to students in order to find suitable job. Prior to graduating from university someone who gets through them can work part time and via this way students are able to supply a portion of their expenses without depending completely on their parents. This factor strengthens the life expectancy between students to great extent. Furthermore, after graduating they are attracted to the market immediately due to their competence in own field. Two years ago, I was studying mechanic engineering and that time the university sent me a factory. The best experience from that course to me was that I became inexperienced in welding and now any work related to it at home I solely do it without a need to welder. Finally, I strongly recommend universities to plan the internship courses for students, whose obligation is to follow them, because such kinds of policy brings them brilliant future, more successes, and most importantly a source of revenue that guarantees them.
Definitely, I am
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agreed
with the foregoing remark.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
University’s
authorities along with theoretical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
courses
should offer an internship
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
courses
. The benefits of this policy are vast, such as preparing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
for future job, giving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
better job opportunities, and creating more memorable
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
for them.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
aspects of the arguments
are discussed
below.

The
first
and compelling reason why I believe that internship
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
courses
should
be required
is that by taking them, educational environments become warm and pleasurable for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
. This
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
interested in going on their education, and in the meanwhile performing internships
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
can have an in-depth understanding what they have learned
theoretically
in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
. Apart from this aspect,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to know with new
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in workplace during internship. This in turn forms memorable
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
among us and even we may take a photo from each other. As we look back the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
memories, we retell
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of them to our children, and perhaps children
are honored
your parents
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of their parents’ achievements. As such, getting through internship
is required
for students.

Another point concerning the internship
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
courses
is that these take care of necessary
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
in order to find suitable job. Prior to graduating from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
someone who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
through them can work
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
part time
and via this way
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are able to supply a portion of their expenses without depending completely on their parents. This factor strengthens the life expectancy between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to great extent.
Furthermore
, after graduating they
are attracted
to the market immediately due to their competence in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
field. Two years ago, I was studying mechanic engineering and that time the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sent
me a factory. The best experience from that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
course
to me was that I became inexperienced in welding and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
any work related to it at home I
solely
do it without a need to welder.

Finally
, I
strongly
recommend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
to plan the internship
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
courses
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
, whose obligation is to follow them,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
such kinds of policy brings them brilliant future, more successes, and most
importantly
a source of revenue that guarantees them.
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IELTS essay A university education should include an internship or some type of work experience? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answers.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
354 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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