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why animal loss. give reasons and solutions

why animal loss. give reasons and solutions YkGAr
It is very essential to give the reasons that cause the loss in the number of animals. Firstly, animal habitats are gradually disappearing, it can be considered as a greatest influence on animal life. The more the earth’s temperature increases, the more forest fires occur. Let’s take the bushfire in Australia (2019-2020) as an example, one of the worst disasters in history. Due to climate change, deforestation destroyed millions of hectares of forest and millions of animals were homeless, it also led to the death of some species. Beside that, their habitat is destroyed by human deforestation. People cut down forests to build houses and cultivate agriculture, as a result, forest area has decreased sharply and it is also a factor causing environmental pollution. The second reason is poaching and illegal hunting. Although the government has legal regulations, some people still illegally hunt endangered animals to earn a huge income, for example rhino horn, deerhorn, pangolin and many other wild animals. Last but not least, the appearance of new diseases. Along with environmental pollution, many diseases spread rapidly and jeopardize the survival of some species.
It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
essential to give the reasons that cause the loss in the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
.
Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animal
habitats are
gradually
disappearing, it can
be considered
as
Use "the" with the superlative.
a
greatest influence on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animal
life. The more the earth’s temperature increases, the more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
forest
fires occur.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Let
’s take the bushfire in Australia (2019-2020) as an example, one of the worst disasters in history. Due to climate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
, deforestation
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroyed
millions of hectares of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
forest
and millions of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
were homeless, it
also
led to the death of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
species. Beside that, their habitat is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroyed
by human deforestation.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
down
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
forests
to build
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
and cultivate agriculture,
as a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
forest
area has decreased
sharply
and it is
also
a factor causing environmental pollution. The second reason is poaching and illegal hunting. Although the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
has legal regulations,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
still
illegally
hunt endangered
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
to earn a huge income,
for example
rhino horn,
Possible spelling mistake found.
deerhorn
, pangolin and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
other wild
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
. Last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not least, the appearance of new diseases. Along with environmental pollution,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
diseases spread
rapidly
and jeopardize the survival of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
species.
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IELTS essay why animal loss. give reasons and solutions

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
185 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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