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Who is responsible for education?

Who is responsible for education? Ble2j
Education plays an essential role in our life. We learn about how to spend a good life. so i agree with that its vey necessary to get an study. And we also make our career. to begin with, education is vey necessary for everyone. Because we can learn that how to live in society consequently the government should open the public schools where poor children get information and compose there career. However, education also opens our mind to improve ourselves our environment our world and also teaches about the behavior how to behave with elder and younger. With education, we can improve their skills in life. There both responsible parents and teacher for children education but parent are the main due to the fact child spend much time with their parents so they can give ethical discipline and teaches the common things which are very necessary in the society. Moreover, education set our minds in society where we can develope our social and economical system. Furthermore, educated people can develop our country they get at a higher rank. Nowadays, there are a number of ways to get an education through the internet where each and everything available. And education is the main resource to develop a country with good ideas and rich people try to give a donation to poor people they get a good education. In my conclusion, for making a career we should get a higher education to develop our country with educated ideas and form enconmical strong to their country. So government are the main responsible to open schools and held campaigns where poor people get information
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Education
plays an essential role in our life. We learn about how to spend a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
life.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
so
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with that its
Possible spelling mistake found.
vey
necessary to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
Use "a" instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
an
study. And we
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
our career.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is
Possible spelling mistake found.
vey
necessary for everyone.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
we can learn that how to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in society
consequently
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should open the public schools where poor children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
information and compose there career.
However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
also
opens our mind to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
ourselves our environment our world and
also
teaches about the behavior how to behave with elder and younger. With
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
, we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
in life. There both responsible parents and teacher for children
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
parent are the main due to the fact child spend much time with their parents
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they can give ethical discipline and teaches the common things which are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
necessary in the society.

Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
set our minds in society where we can
Possible spelling mistake found.
develope
our social and
Did you mean "economic" (=connected with economy)?
economical
system.
Furthermore
, educated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
develop
our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
at a higher rank. Nowadays, there are a number of ways to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
through the internet where each and everything available. And
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is the main resource to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
develop
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
and rich
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
try to give a donation to poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
education.

In my conclusion, for making a career we should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
develop
our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
with educated
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
and form
Possible spelling mistake found.
enconmical
strong to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
are the main responsible to open schools and held campaigns where poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
information
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IELTS essay Who is responsible for education?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
269 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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