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While some sports are typically played in teams, others are usually done by individuals. There are, of course, benefits to both team sports and individual ones, and this essay will explore both, before coming to the conclusion that team sports are slightly more beneficial. v.1

While some sports are typically played in teams, others are usually done by individuals. There are, of course, benefits to both team sports and individual ones, and this essay will explore both, before coming to the conclusion that team sports are slightly more beneficial. v. 1
Some people argue that team sports provide players with a wide range of benefits while others think that individual sports are much better. From my perspectives, I think both types of sports have their own benefits and it depends on what benefits each individual wishes to achieve as to which sport they should choose to play. On the one hand, team sports give players opportunities to develop interpersonal skills such as teamwork and communication skills. These benefits not only help people in their day-to-day social interactions but also accelerate their career. Furthermore, team sports offer players the chance to strengthen sense of unity, friendship and sportsmanship between people in a team. In this sense, it really adds value to people's live by making them feel a part of something. On the other hand, individual sports, like tennis and swimming, also have their merits. When someone plays an individual sport, it usually gives them more opportunities to enhance their personal skills, such as being able to manage emotions, cope with stress, and build confidence and self-esteem. When people are playing an individual sport, they usually have no one else to rely on for support during the game or match, and therefore, individuals will need to develop a strong mindset to be able to deal with and overcome any setbacks they may face. Individual sports also provide better opportunities for people to challenge themselves by setting goals and achieving personal bests. Individual sports also allow for independence and can be a great fit for a kid who doesn't like to rely on someone else's skills to perform well. In conclusion, I feel that all sports offer great benefits for people’s mental and physical health, and that people should choose whatever sport they are most interested in playing.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
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people
argue that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
team
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
provide players with a wide range of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
benefits
while others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
are much better. From my perspectives, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
both types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
benefits
and it depends on what
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benefits
each
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individual
wishes to achieve as to which
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sport
they should choose to play.

On the one hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
team
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
give players opportunities to develop interpersonal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
such as teamwork and communication
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
. These
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benefits
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
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people
in their day-to-day social interactions
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but
also
accelerate their career.
Furthermore
,
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team
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
offer players the chance to strengthen sense of unity, friendship and sportsmanship between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
team
. In this sense, it
really
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
adds
value to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
by making them feel a part of something.

On the other hand
,
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individual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
, like tennis and swimming,
also
have their merits. When someone plays an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
, it
usually
gives them more opportunities to enhance their personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
, such as being able to manage emotions, cope with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
, and build confidence and self-esteem. When
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are playing an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
, they
usually
have no one else to rely on for support during the game or match, and
therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
will need to develop a strong mindset to be able to deal with and overcome any setbacks they may face.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Individual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
also
provide better opportunities for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to challenge themselves by setting goals and achieving personal bests.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Individual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
for independence and can be a great fit for a kid who doesn't like to rely on someone else's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
to perform well.

In conclusion
, I feel that all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
The word 'offer' contains a ligature (joined letters). Modern English does not usually use ligatures. A ligature in a word causes a spelling error. If the word is an English word, write it with standard characters.
offer
great
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
benefits
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
mental and physical health, and that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should choose whatever
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
they are most interested in playing.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
41Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay While some sports are typically played in teams, others are usually done by individuals. There are, of course, benefits to both team sports and individual ones, and this essay will explore both, before coming to the conclusion that team sports are slightly more beneficial. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
295 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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