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While some people believe that using a phone in public areas like libraries and shops should be banned, I think that issue might be consider as an emergency situation

While some people believe that using a phone in public areas like libraries and shops should be banned, I think that issue might be consider as an emergency situation 0paGO
While some people believe that using a phone in public areas like libraries and shops should be banned, I think that issue might be consider as an emergency situation. On the one hand, I can understand why mobile phones should be banned in public places like libraries and shops. Firstly, if some people do not caution about public area rules that mobile should not be used, other people in such places would get annoyed and they would not concentrate on their activities. As a result, noisy mobile phone users would be fined and even their cell phones would be kept by the people in charge. Secondly, when mobile phones are allowed in public, it would lead to a big concern from noise pollution in libraries and shops, which would make other people distract and cannot completely focus on their duty. This explains why most libraries and shops in Viet Nam require readers and customers not to use mobile phones inside. On the other hand, I would argue that cell phones should not be allowed in public places such as libraries and shops for the following reasons. First, if people are not allowed to use mobile phones in public, sometimes they would not recognize that it can be an important call from family, friends or business partners. As a result, they would never know who is calling to and skip such an important message or phone call. Second, when people are prohibited to use cellphones in libraries and shops, they would not check information on books in libraries or the price and origin of the products they like to buy in shops. This is a reason why cellphones are still allowed in many libraries and shops but they must be in the silent mode. In conclusion, I believe that mobile phones should not be prohibited outdoors, for example in libraries and shops for the reasons discussed above.
While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that using a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
areas like libraries and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
should
be banned
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that issue might be
Consider using the past participle "considered"?
consider
as an emergency situation.

On the one hand, I can understand why mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
should
be banned
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
places like libraries and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
.
Firstly
, if
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not caution about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
area
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
that mobile should not be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
, other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in such places would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
annoyed and
they would not concentrate on their activities.
As a result
, noisy mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
users would
be fined
and even their cell
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
would be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in charge.
Secondly
, when mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
allowed
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
, it would lead to a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
concern from noise pollution in libraries and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
, which would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
distract and cannot completely focus on their duty. This
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explains
why most libraries and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
in
Possible spelling mistake found.
Viet
Nam require readers and customers not to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
inside.

On the other hand
, I would argue that cell
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
should not be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
allowed
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
places such as libraries and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
for the following reasons.
First
, if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
allowed
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
they would not recognize that it can be an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
call from family, friends or business partners.
As a result
, they would never know who is calling to and skip such an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
message or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
call. Second, when
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people
are prohibited
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
cellphones in libraries and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
, they would not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
information on books in libraries or the price and origin of the products they like to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
. This is a reason why cellphones are
still
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
allowed
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
libraries and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be in the silent mode.

In conclusion
, I believe that mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
should not
be prohibited
outdoors,
for example
in libraries and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
for the reasons discussed above.
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IELTS essay While some people believe that using a phone in public areas like libraries and shops should be banned, I think that issue might be consider as an emergency situation

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
316 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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