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Which part of governing a country did you find the most interesting?

Which part of governing a country did you find the most interesting? Gw15o
The main organs of government are the executive, the legislature, and the judiciary, which have different powers and perform different functions to rule a country. In my opinion, the roles and responsibilities of the executive part are much more crucial, powerful, and interesting than the other two parts. The executive is the branch of government which is responsible for policy-making and implementation of laws made by the legislature in the country. The separation of power throughout the country is mainly based on the type of constitution and each power is connected and vital for organizing a country. The legislature and judiciary are essential for legislation, protecting rule of laws, and monitoring the work of government, however, the executive is more important because they have to work for the all-round development of the nation. Moreover, they perform key activities such as policy formation, declaration of war and peace, budgeting, maintenance of law and order, the conduct of managing foreign relations, control of military forces, and enforcement of laws. In conclusion, governments play a major part in achieving happiness, good health, security, and prosperity of citizens. Therefore, they should be careful about the welfare of citizens and enact laws that which protect individual rights, liberties, justice, equality, ensuring that it is and it should be equally applied to citizens.
The main organs of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
are the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
executive
, the legislature, and the judiciary, which have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
powers and perform
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
functions to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rule
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. In my opinion, the roles and responsibilities of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
executive
part are much more crucial, powerful, and interesting than the other two parts.

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
executive
is the branch of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
which is responsible for policy-making and implementation of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
laws
made by the legislature in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. The separation of power throughout the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
is
mainly
based on the type of constitution and each power
is connected
and vital for organizing a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
The
legislature and judiciary are essential for legislation, protecting
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rule
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
laws
, and monitoring the work of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
,
however
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
executive
is more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
work for the all-round development of the nation.
Moreover
, they perform key activities such as policy formation, declaration of war and peace, budgeting, maintenance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
law
and order, the conduct of managing foreign relations, control of military forces, and enforcement of laws.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
play a major part in achieving happiness,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
health, security, and prosperity of citizens.
Therefore
, they should be careful about the welfare of citizens and enact
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
laws
that which protect individual rights, liberties, justice, equality, ensuring that it is and it should be
equally
applied to citizens.
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IELTS essay Which part of governing a country did you find the most interesting?

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
217 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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