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Which one is more important friends or family. Give your opinion

Which one is more important friends or family. Give your opinion Nl7Jd
Family and friends both are one of the important part of our life. But, if one have to choose between them, I would choose family over friends. Family always support us in every part of our life. They show us the path to get success in future. Firstly, family is our strength in life. We are nothing without our parents. They love us unconditionally. They fullfill our demand by sacrificing many things. From our early age they provide food, shelter, clothes and so on to us. They bear all our educational fee from school to college life. Parents are our role model. We always take footstep shown by them. In addition, our parents shower us devotion us since the day we were born. Secondly, family supports us with physically, mentally, and emotionally. They support us in our ups and down. Colleague may abandon you when things get tough, but family hardly will run away from you when things are not working out. Neverthless, parents didn't taught us wrong things whereas friends may taught you to do wrong things. Similarly, they are our teacher, god in our life. However, family ties are unbreakable and exist forever. As we can share our emotion to mate but they may not understand our feelings whereas our parents appreciate our notion and sentiment in every situation of our life. To conclude, in today's world family is more important than family. They give us emotional strength to overcome from day to day problems.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Family
and friends both are one of the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
part of our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, if one
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
choose between them, I would choose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
over friends.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Family
always support us in every part of our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. They
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
us the path to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
success
Did you mean: "in the future"?
in future
.

Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
is our strength in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. We are nothing without our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
. They
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
us
unconditionally
. They
Possible spelling mistake found.
fullfill
our demand by sacrificing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
things. From our early age they provide food, shelter, clothes and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on to us. They bear all our educational fee from school to college
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Parents
are our role model. We always take footstep shown by them.
In addition
, our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
shower us devotion us since the day we
were born
.

Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
supports us with
physically
, mentally, and
emotionally
. They support us in our ups and down. Colleague may abandon you when things
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
tough,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
The adverb 'hardly' is usually put between 'will' and 'run'.
hardly will run
away from you when things are not working out.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Neverthless
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
didn't
The verb 'didn't' requires base form of this verb: "teach"
taught
us
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
things whereas friends may taught you to do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
things.
Similarly
, they are our teacher, god in our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
ties are unbreakable and exist forever. As we can share our emotion to mate
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they may not understand our feelings whereas our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
appreciate our notion and sentiment in every situation of our life.

To conclude
, in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's world
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
is more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
. They give us emotional strength to overcome from day to day problems.
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IELTS essay Which one is more important friends or family. Give your opinion

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
247 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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