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Which do you prefer: a high-paying job with long hours or a lower-paying job with shorter hours? Use specific reasons and details to support your answer.

Which do you prefer: a high-paying job with long hours or a lower-paying job with shorter hours? Use specific reasons and details to support your answer. wm6wY
In this modern era, competition is rising rapidly and as a result, people are opting for jobs with long working hours and higher wages to survive. Although working day and night helps them earn money, it leaves them with no leisure time to spend with family and friends. Personally, I feel I will always choose my family before anything else, so, I will opt for low paying job with shorter hours to spend time with my family. Firstly, more than money mental peace is important to me. If I am not happy with my workplace, and I am stressed out for most of the day, there is no way I can enjoy my salary. Perhaps, I will be spending more on my medical bills due to this. For instance, with busy schedules, I may not get enough time to sleep and exercise which can make me sick. Secondly, with work commitments, I will be missing most of the family events and I will be juggling between both work and social life. What is the point of earning money, if I cannot enjoy any free time with my family? Additionally, in long run, it will only distant me from my people. On the other hand, with jobs demanding short working hours, it becomes easier to balance life. Like, I can spend evenings with my family and friends; I can go on holiday. Moreover, I can take better care of myself too by doing exercises and other extra-curricular activities. Even though with less money, I feel I will be in a more happy and satisfying space. For example, if I am giving time to my kids, they will value me more and maybe this will make them more aware of what real happiness means. Nowadays, children have become distant from their parents because of their busy schedules. To conclude, we cannot deny the fact that financial stability is important but ignoring social life because of work can be harmful in long run. It can lead to depression and many other psychological health conditions. A person should try to strike a balance between the two in order to have a happy and fulfilling life.
In this modern era, competition is rising
rapidly
and
as a result
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are opting for jobs with long working hours and higher wages to survive. Although working day and night
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them earn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leaves
them with no leisure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to spend with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
and friends.
Personally
, I feel I will always choose my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
anything else,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, I will opt for low paying job with shorter hours to spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with my family.

Firstly
, more than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
mental peace is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to me. If I am not happy with my workplace, and I am
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stressed
out for most of the day, there is no way I can enjoy my salary. Perhaps, I will be spending more on my medical bills due to this.
For instance
, with busy schedules, I may not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to sleep and exercise which can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
me sick.
Secondly
, with work commitments, I will be missing most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
and I will be juggling between both work and social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. What is the point of earning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
, if I cannot enjoy any free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
?
Additionally
, in long run, it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
distant me from my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

On the other hand
, with jobs demanding short working hours, it becomes easier to balance
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. Like, I can spend evenings with my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
and friends; I can go on holiday.
Moreover
, I can take better care of myself too by doing exercises and other extra-curricular activities.
Even though
with less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
, I feel I will be in a more happy and satisfying space.
For example
, if I am giving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to my kids, they will value me more and maybe this will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them more aware of what real happiness means. Nowadays, children have become distant from their parents
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of their busy schedules.

To conclude
, we cannot deny the fact that financial stability is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
ignoring social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of work can be harmful in long run. It can lead to depression and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
other psychological health conditions. A person should try to strike a balance between the two in order to have a happy and fulfilling
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
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IELTS essay Which do you prefer: a high-paying job with long hours or a lower-paying job with shorter hours? Use specific reasons and details to support your answer.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
361 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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