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Whether we are happy or not depends on the personality you are born with. Do you agree?

Whether we are happy or not depends on the personality you are born with. Do you agree? j58ry
There is no denying that happiness is the goal of all human endeavour. People have different views regarding the factors making people have a sense of well-being. A growing number of people show strong support to the argument that our inborn character is the key element contributing to our state of euphoria. From my perspective, there are a number of different aspects which exert significant impacts on people’s experience of exhilaration rather than just our identity. It is indisputable that temperament, which appears to have a genetic component according to several recent studies, has a direct bearing on our happiness. In fact, the way of thinking and approaching problems is a key factor in recognizing feeling of well-being. Happier people are more optimistic and more willing to push themselves and take their chances without feeling defeated or rejected. That is to say, a person who has possitive attitude will think that the obstacles that he faces are not really bad and he can totally find the solution to overcome them, making him happier since he could turn challenging things into easy ones. However, there are also a lot of aspects which are correlated with our gladness. One way that people can gain pleasure is having supportive and loved ones in life. Being surrounded by a caring family and friends who are always willing to support us is considered by most people to be more valuable than anything that makes them happy. By having lunch or going for a walk with them, we can easily realize that joyment is just arround us. Furthermore, another factor influencing rejoicing is the contentment at work. For instance, a doctor doing voluntary work in underprivileged countries may have very little money but the reward of helping people and doing the job they are good at bring happiness in itself. In other words, happiness can be found in job satisfaction. In conclusion, although to a certain extent I accept that happiness may be genetically determined in some respects, I hold a firm belief that there are other points which are connected to our good spirit.
There is no denying that
happiness
is the goal of all human
endeavour
.
People
have
different
views regarding the factors making
people
have a sense of well-being. A growing number of
people
show
strong support to the argument that our inborn character is the key element contributing to our state of euphoria. From my perspective, there are a number of
different
aspects which exert significant impacts on
people’s
experience of exhilaration
rather
than
just
our identity.

It is indisputable that temperament, which appears to have a genetic component according to several recent studies, has a direct bearing on our
happiness
. In fact, the way of thinking and approaching problems is a key factor in recognizing feeling of well-being. Happier
people
are more optimistic and more willing to push themselves and take their chances without feeling defeated or rejected.
That is
to say, a person who has
possitive
attitude will
think
that the obstacles that he faces are not
really
bad
and he can
totally
find the solution to overcome them, making him happier since he could turn challenging things into easy ones.

However
, there are
also
a lot of
aspects which
are correlated
with our gladness. One way that
people
can gain pleasure is having supportive and
loved
ones in life.
Being surrounded
by a caring family and friends who are always willing to support us
is considered
by most
people
to be more valuable than anything that
makes
them happy. By having lunch or going for a walk with them, we can
easily
realize that
joyment
is
just
arround
us.
Furthermore
, another factor influencing rejoicing is the contentment at work.
For instance
, a doctor doing voluntary work in underprivileged countries may have
very
little
money
but
the reward of helping
people
and doing the job they are
good
at bring
happiness
in itself.
In other words
,
happiness
can
be found
in job satisfaction.

In conclusion
, although to a certain extent I accept that
happiness
may be
genetically
determined in
some
respects, I hold a firm belief that there are other points which
are connected
to our
good
spirit.
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IELTS essay Whether we are happy or not depends on the personality you are born with. Do you agree?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
349 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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