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Whether the design of the building will have a positive or negative impact on people's life and work? Discuss factors v.1

Whether the design of the building will have a positive or negative impact on people's life and work? Discuss factors v. 1
It is considered by some that ethical qualities in commanders are inborn talent, however others opine that efficient parameter which are required for success, may achieve due to social interaction. Personally, I reckon that the abilities of great leaders are generated partially through innate skills, yet mostly through learning. This essay will discuss both points of view with some reasons. On the one hand, leaders are born with some traits that distinguish them from others. By this I mean, special characteristics make them able to identify the needs of their team members and have proper behaviour to obtain the support from people who are partners. Similarly, many children actually appear to have the qualities of leadership in very young age, which may be inherited from parents and relatives. For example, nowadays it is not unusual to recognize some best team leaders in high school level, who would later play important in their companies or even nations. However, inborn quality nature is not enough to become an excellent leader. Consequently, the ability must be attained through one time life experience. In other words, special characteristics with such accumulated background coupled with some learning method, the leader would handily others who need guidance to achieve desired goals. Take example president Nariender Modi as an example, after discovering and learning many new conception from many countries, he is fighting against enemies for better success and growth. In conclusion, it is obvious that some qualities of leadership can be somewhat acquired as innate talent. Meanwhile, the majority skills are the result of training and effort. Therefore, people should study, observe and practiced frequently to improve their abilities which would form outstanding leaders.
It
is considered
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
that ethical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
qualities
in commanders are inborn talent,
however
others opine that efficient parameter which
are required
for success, may achieve due to social interaction.
Personally
, I reckon that the abilities of great
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leaders
are generated
partially
through innate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
,
yet
mostly
through learning. This essay will discuss both points of view with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
reasons.

On the one hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leaders
are born
with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
traits that distinguish them from others. By this I mean, special characteristics
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them able to identify the needs of their team members and have proper
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
to obtain the support from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who are partners.
Similarly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
children actually appear to have the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
qualities
of leadership in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
young age, which may
be inherited
from parents and relatives.
For example
, nowadays it is not unusual to recognize
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
best team
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leaders
in high school level, who would later play
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
or even nations.

However
, inborn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
nature is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
to become an excellent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leader
.
Consequently
, the ability
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be attained
through one time life experience. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
words, special characteristics with such accumulated background coupled with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
learning method, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leader
would
handily
others who need guidance to achieve desired goals. Take example president
Possible spelling mistake found.
Nariender
Possible spelling mistake found.
Modi
as an example, after discovering and learning
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
new conception from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries, he is fighting against enemies for better success and growth.

In conclusion
, it is obvious that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
qualities
of leadership can be somewhat acquired as innate talent. Meanwhile, the majority
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
are the result of training and effort.
Therefore
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
should study, observe and practiced
frequently
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their abilities which would form outstanding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
leaders
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Whether the design of the building will have a positive or negative impact on people's life and work? Discuss factors v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
278 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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