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WHETHER OR NOT SOMEONE ACHIEVE THEIR AIM IS MOSTLY A QUESTION OF LUCK. TO WHAT EXTENT DO YOU AGREE OR DISAGREE.

WHETHER OR NOT SOMEONE ACHIEVE THEIR AIM IS MOSTLY A QUESTION OF LUCK. PRKBd
It is argued that the likelihood of attaining goals by individual is largely by chance. While I concur to the above notion, I do believe being successful is not mostly by opportunity. I shall be discussing my reasons in the subsequent paragraphs. One of the reasons why I agree with the argument is because most people had their success story linked to political or familial influence. Some individuals accomplished what they have today through their parents. To illustrate, Robert Stone, who is the fifth richest man globally, acquired this status through the wealth his parent passed down to him before their demise. As a result of this, being successful is be admitted to be by luck. However, the probability of meeting goal is not significantly through opportunity but hard work. This is because some people were neither born into a wealthy family nor have relationship with the important ones in the environment yet they made it, although it was through rigorous work. This can be explained by Martin Luther King quote which states that, "about one-fourth of the worldwide population were not born with a silver spoon but they defeated failure due to thier determination". Furthemore, some people are still struggling towards achieving their aims despite being related to authoritative individuals. Therefore, achieving or not achieving goal is not mostly dependent on luck. In conclusion, being a successor can be easy for some people, while it might be a herculean task for some individuals. which is why I admitted, and as well refuted the idea.
It
is argued
that the likelihood of attaining goals by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
is
largely
by chance. While I concur to the above notion, I do believe being successful is not
mostly
by opportunity. I shall be discussing my reasons in the subsequent paragraphs.

One of the reasons why I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the argument is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
had their success story linked to political or familial influence.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
accomplished what they have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
through
their parents. To illustrate, Robert Stone, who is the fifth richest
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
globally, acquired this status
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
through
the wealth his parent passed down to him
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
their demise.
As a result
of this, being successful is
Consider using a past participle here: "been".
be
admitted to be by luck.

However
, the probability of meeting goal is not
significantly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
through
opportunity
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
work. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
were neither born into a wealthy family nor have relationship with the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
ones in the environment
yet
they made it, although it was
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
through
rigorous work. This can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explained
by Martin Luther King quote which states that,
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
about one-fourth of the worldwide population were not born with a silver spoon
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they defeated failure due to
Possible spelling mistake found.
thier
determination
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Furthemore
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
still
struggling towards achieving their aims despite
being related
to authoritative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
.
Therefore
, achieving or not achieving goal is not
mostly
dependent on luck.

In conclusion
, being a successor can be easy for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, while it might be a
Possible incorrect capitalization. Some adjectives that are derived from proper nouns can have both an initial capital letter and an initial lower case letter. If there is a close association with the proper noun, use "Herculean".
herculean
task for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
which
is why I admitted, and
as well
refuted the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
.
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IELTS essay WHETHER OR NOT SOMEONE ACHIEVE THEIR AIM IS MOSTLY A QUESTION OF LUCK.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
255 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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