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When a country develops its technology and a way of life that out it is a point to keep them alive. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement.

When a country develops its technology and a way of life that out it is a point to keep them alive. with this statement. GL9LB
We are living in a modern era, where people cannot live without technology. some think that if a country develops its technology, the traditional skill and way of life will die, so it is pointless to effort and keep them alive. I disagree with this statement. it is indeed true that technology plays an instrumental role in human being life but there is plenty of negative impact on the human mind due to more spend time with technology. If a nation high progress can cause of technology the traditional still and human life will die, so people should try to keep the traditional skills such as outdoor, indoor games, community skill as well as cognitive skills. Besides, if people depend on technology, they will suffer from any disease such as myopia, obesity, and psychological disorder so that people should be adopted ancient things which are useful for today's generation.
We are living in a modern era, where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
without
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that if a country develops its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
, the traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skill
and way of life will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
die
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it is pointless to effort and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
them alive. I disagree with this statement.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
it
is
indeed
true that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
plays an instrumental role in human being life
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
there is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impact on the human mind due to more spend time with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
. If a nation high progress can cause of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
the traditional
still
and human life will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
die
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should try to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
the traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
such as outdoor, indoor games, community
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skill
as well
as cognitive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
.
Besides
, if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
depend on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
, they will suffer from any disease such as myopia, obesity, and psychological disorder
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should
be adopted
ancient things which are useful for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's generation.
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IELTS essay When a country develops its technology and a way of life that out it is a point to keep them alive. with this statement.

Essay
  American English
2 paragraphs
149 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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