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What things will computers be used for in the future? Is this dependence on computers a good thing or should we be more suspicious of their benefits?

What things will computers be used for in the future? Is this dependence on computers a good thing or should we be more suspicious of their benefits? YgyWQ
In the modern world, where life-threatening diseases are rampant and increasingly taking human lives, some argue that, in the future, computer innovations will focus on computer field. medical and health sector. For example, it is proposed to create a computer-generated pill that can be swallowed by an individual to assess the person's overall state of health and determine the type of health problem a person has. may encounter. are encountered. encountered, is being studied continuously these days. Therefore, preventing the disease or considering different treatment options before the prognosis worsens can be done with the help of this pill. Moreover, recent inventions are said to be able to help humanity complete work without problems and complexity, so the construction of computer-generated robots is gaining interest and systematic research. . system. value. In the future, the majority of housework is expected to be completed by these computer-generated robots, thus making the lives of employed people more convenient, as the work is done by robots. . stay at home while the employee is performing job responsibilities at work. Having mentioned some future computer transformations, it is by no means certain that these changes can extend an individual's lifespan and help one complete tasks with ease. However, while these changes can be beneficial, it is important to take advantage of these breakthroughs responsibly because total dependence is extremely harmful. More specifically, one's ability to maintain and improve health through healthy eating, exercise, and lifestyle modification practices, so that disease can be prevented even without support. aid. . . aid of computer-generated drugs. In addition, personal care provided by a healthcare provider must not exceed or be disproportionately provided by computer-generated reviewers. Furthermore, dependence on robots can certainly make people lazy, putting people at risk of living sedentary lives, and thus, obesity and lifestyle-related diseases. Furthermore, letting robots do all the daily chores would steal human ingenuity in performing household chores.
In the modern world, where life-threatening
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
diseases
are rampant and
increasingly
taking human
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
argue that, in the future, computer innovations will focus on computer field.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
medical
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
sector.
For example
, it
is proposed
to create a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
computer-generated
pill that can
be swallowed
by an individual to assess the person's
overall
state of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
and determine the type of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
problem a person has.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
may
encounter.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
are
encountered.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
encountered
, is
being studied
continuously
these days.
Therefore
, preventing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
disease
or considering
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
treatment options
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
the prognosis worsens can
be done
with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of this pill.
Moreover
, recent inventions
are said
to be able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
humanity complete work without problems and complexity,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
the construction of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
computer-generated
robots is gaining interest and systematic research.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
system
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
value
. In the future, the majority of housework is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expected
to
be completed
by these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
computer-generated
robots,
thus
making the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
of employed
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
more convenient, as the work
is done
by robots.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
stay
at home while the employee is performing job responsibilities at work.

Having mentioned
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
future computer transformations, it is by no means certain that these
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
can extend an individual's lifespan and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
one complete tasks with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ease
.
However
, while these
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
can be beneficial, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to take advantage of these breakthroughs
responsibly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
total dependence is
extremely
harmful. More
specifically
, one's ability to maintain and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
through healthy eating, exercise, and lifestyle modification practices,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
disease
can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevented
even without support.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
aid
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
aid
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
computer-generated
drugs.
In addition
, personal care provided by a healthcare provider
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
not exceed or be
disproportionately
provided by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
computer-generated
reviewers.
Furthermore
, dependence on robots can
certainly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
lazy, putting
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
at
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
of living sedentary
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
, and
thus
, obesity and lifestyle-related
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
diseases
.
Two successive sentences begin with the same adverb. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
Furthermore
, letting robots do all the daily chores would steal human ingenuity in performing household chores.
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IELTS essay What things will computers be used for in the future? Is this dependence on computers a good thing or should we be more suspicious of their benefits?

Essay
  American English
2 paragraphs
317 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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