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what problems can be associated with organizing a large family event and what solution can you suggest

what problems can be associated with organizing a large family event and what solution can you suggest oxb7K
Always one of most challenging things in families, is making a plane for celebrate a family ceremony such as engagement ceremony or wedding party. In the following essay I will discuss about several issues that may happened on this kind of programs moreover how to solve them. In my opinion, the main problem is that how foods are served, because everyone wants have exclusive meal but, in this case, maybe some guests be in a special diet or can just have healthy appetite. I have remembered at my cousin’s marriage party, my uncle who has diabetes in addition used to vegan at that time couldn’t eat any food on the table. For the next difficulty, when you try to set plan is critical and if time is chosen inadequate, it makes undeniable effects as well as everyone start to complain. For the last knot, I can mention big little problems, hyperactive childrens can bother you every moment. Personally, I have tasted it at my last birthday party when windows glasses are broken by neighbor’s son. My experiences show that these types of issues have sample solutions. First, if you want to make enjoyable time besides show your hospitality, you must cook the two most popular food you know as your main course more over a salad that you sure everyone keen on. Second, It is a trivial fact you have to holding your parties at the weekend or holidays so It is more sufficient for people are invented. Finally, entertain children if you want to have a glorious ceremony. To conclude, try to gathering all member of families seems impossible at the first glance but if you think out of the box and face with challenges you will find really impressive solution.
Always one of most challenging things in families, is making a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plane
for celebrate a family ceremony such as engagement ceremony or wedding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
party
. In the following essay I will
Did you mean simply "discuss several"? You do not need the word "about" here.
discuss about several
issues that may happened on this kind of programs
moreover
how to solve them.

In my opinion, the main problem is that how foods
are served
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
everyone
Probably a preposition is missing after 'wants'.
wants have
exclusive meal
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
,
in this case
, maybe
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
guests be in a special diet or can
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
have healthy appetite. I have remembered at my cousin’s marriage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
party
, my uncle who has diabetes
in addition
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to vegan at that time couldn’t eat any food on the table. For the
next
difficulty, when you try to set plan is critical and if time
is chosen
inadequate, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
undeniable effects
as well
as everyone
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
to complain. For the last knot, I can mention
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
problems, hyperactive
Possible spelling mistake found.
childrens can
bother you every moment.
Personally
, I have tasted it at my last birthday
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
party
when windows glasses
are broken
by neighbor’s son.

My experiences
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
that these types of issues have sample solutions.
First
, if you want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
enjoyable time
besides
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
your hospitality, you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
cook the two most popular food you know as your main course more over a salad that you sure everyone keen on. Second, It is a trivial fact you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
holding your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parties
at the weekend or holidays
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
It is more sufficient for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are invented
.
Finally
, entertain children if you want to have a glorious ceremony.

To conclude
, try to
Did you mean "gather"?
gathering
all member of families seems impossible at the
first
glance
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
if you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
out of the box and face with challenges you will find
really
impressive solution.
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IELTS essay what problems can be associated with organizing a large family event and what solution can you suggest

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
292 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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