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What is the most important value of human in your aspect?

What is the most important value of human in your aspect? 1brQq
In my perspective, hope is the fuel of human life. Hope is the greatest happiness of people. It makes life worthwhile and induces other virtues like courage, perseverance and life’s purpose. Even in the darkest day, it brings smile to parched lips and laughter to desperate hearts. 18 years passed since I was born, I have met and talked to many successful persons. As I have experienced with these people, I noticed that they have something in common, which is “Hope”. Hope always come with dreams and goals. If we have hope it means we already set goal in our mind. Nowadays, people always hope for little things such as hoping to see you soon or hoping you get well soon but never realised how the word “hope” have impact on outs live. The poor hope to have something to eat every day. The rich hope to get richer and richer. Patients hope to get rid of their illness. Even me, I also hope to study as a dental student at Chiang Mai University. Furthermore, hope is one of the most important and powerful emotions that can brings humans forward in life. However, I always question myself “How can I be the person that make other people around me feel that they have hope when they are hopeless”. Therefore, when it comes to my job, I want to work in the field that I can bring them back to faith again. Dentist is the job that perfectly fit my career goals. Taking everything inti account, the most value of human in my aspect is to help people who feel worthless because they are hopeless become the better person and feel confident in their life again.
In my perspective,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hope
is the fuel of human
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Hope
is the greatest happiness of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. It
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
worthwhile and induces other virtues like courage, perseverance and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life’s
purpose. Even in the darkest day, it brings smile to parched lips and laughter to desperate hearts. 18 years passed since I
was born
, I have met and talked to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
successful persons. As I have experienced with these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, I noticed that they have something in common, which is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
“Hope”
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Hope
always
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
with dreams and goals.
“If” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
If
we have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hope
it means we already set goal in our mind. Nowadays,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
always
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hope
for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
things such as hoping to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
or hoping you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
well
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
never
Possible spelling mistake. 'realised' is British English.
realised
how the word
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
“hope”
have impact on outs
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
. The poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hope
to have something to eat every day. The rich
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hope
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
richer and richer. Patients
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hope
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
rid of their illness. Even me, I
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hope
to study as a dental student at Chiang Mai University.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hope
is one of the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
and powerful emotions that can brings humans forward in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
However
, I always question myself “How can I be the person that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
around me feel that they have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hope
when they are hopeless”.
Therefore
, when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to my job, I want to work in the field that I can bring them back to faith again. Dentist is the job that
perfectly
fit my career goals. Taking everything
Possible spelling mistake found.
inti
account, the most value of human in my aspect is to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who feel worthless
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they are hopeless become the better person and feel confident in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
again.
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IELTS essay What is the most important value of human in your aspect?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
285 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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