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Some people say that advertising prompt us to purchase unnecessary items. Others say that advertisement tell us about new products that may benefit our lives.

Some people say that advertising prompt us to purchase unnecessary items. Others say that advertisement tell us about new products that may benefit our lives. N3Rem
In the 4. 0 era, so many products are created. So advertisement has become the method that could introduce the products to people. Some people say that advertising prompt us to purchase unnecessary items. Others say that advertisement tell us about new products that may benefit our lives. On the one hand, advertising may make people buy things that regardless their needs. Absolutey, advertising put pressure on people to purchase new products. The advertisers use delightful contents, creating vivid images or celebrity endorsement. These disposition influence subconsious mindset of consumers then trigger demand for items. For representation, smartphone labels manipulate the advertisement to make people feel a need to buy the lastest one even though the current phone still functions perfectly. Nevertheless, I would argue that advertising plays a cruial role in introducing products which are beneficial to people’s lives. Nowadays, innovative products are invented more and more everyday and advertising is the best process to allow them reach out to many consumers. It makes our lives more convenience and change people’s lifestyles. For instance, drive-sharing applications like Grab, Uber, …. . are becoming well-known. They change te behavior of millions of consumers around the world, help us to book cars more easily, especially more convenient and the prices are cheaper than the traditional one. To sum up, advertisement has 2 sides view, but anyway I think it ís an useful information source that helps us to update our knowledge and ìnformation everyday, it also makes our lives become easier.
In the 4. 0
Possible agreement error. The noun 'era' seems to be countable, so consider using: "eras".
era
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
are created
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
has become the method that could introduce the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
say that advertising prompt us to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
unnecessary items. Others say that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
us about new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
that may benefit our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.

On the one hand, advertising may
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
things that regardless their needs.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Absolutey
, advertising put pressure on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
. The advertisers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
delightful contents, creating vivid images or celebrity endorsement.
Did you mean "this disposition" or "These dispositions"?
These disposition
influence
Possible spelling mistake found.
subconsious
mindset of consumers then trigger demand for items. For representation, smartphone labels manipulate the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
feel a need to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
the
Possible spelling mistake found.
lastest
one
even though
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
phone
still
functions
perfectly
.

Nevertheless
, I would argue that advertising plays a
Possible spelling mistake found.
cruial
role in introducing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
which are beneficial to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. Nowadays, innovative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
are invented
more and more
'Everyday' is an adjective. Did you mean "every day"?
everyday
and advertising is the best process to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
them
Please check whether 'to' is missing here (to allow to do something).
reach
out to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
consumers. It
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
more convenience and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
lifestyles.
For instance
, drive-sharing applications like Grab, Uber, ….
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
are
becoming well-known. They
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
Possible spelling mistake found.
te
behavior of millions of consumers around the world,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us to book cars more
easily
,
especially
more convenient and the prices are cheaper than the traditional one.

To sum up,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
has 2 sides view,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
anyway I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
it
Possible spelling mistake found.
ís
Use "a" instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
an
useful information source that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
us to update our knowledge and
Possible spelling mistake found.
ìnformation
'Everyday' is an adjective. Did you mean "every day"?
everyday
, it
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
become easier.
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IELTS essay Some people say that advertising prompt us to purchase unnecessary items. Others say that advertisement tell us about new products that may benefit our lives.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
250 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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