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Using a computer every day can have more negative than positive effects on children. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. v.6

Using a computer every day can have more negative than positive effects on children. v. 6
Nowadays, scholars spend a huge amount of time in front of devices, such as computers, being that both prejudicial and beneficial for them. I agree, because I believe that children can obtain a lot of valuable information navigating on websites. However, they need be on the fresh air too, spending the day outside the house. First of all, Internet is an amazing tool to expanding knowledge, as well as playing games and be connected with other people. Children can enjoy their free moments and learning a lot of new subjects using a computer with an adult supervision in all cases. For instance, when I was young I really wanted to know everything about dinosaurs, thus I did not have the possibility to buy dinosaur history books because they were too expensive. Fortunately, I could get plenty of information using my computer and looking for amazing drawings of them. On the other hand, being all and every day watching a screen is not the best idea, and it can bring negative effects on kids. Children need to go outside, enjoy the nature, such as a park, and playing games with others face to face. For example, my brother usually spent a long time using these kind of devices, and the final result was that he lost his friends from school because he never had space to going around or hanging up with them. To sum up, technology can be both beneficial and prejudicial to little ones. The key is making a balance between using a computer and stay outside doing other activities. Parents should be aware about that, and, furthermore, they must supervise their offspring when they are using devices to control the time.
Nowadays, scholars spend a huge amount of time in front of devices, such as computers, being that both prejudicial and beneficial for them. I
agree
,
because
I believe that children can obtain
a lot of
valuable information navigating on websites.
However
, they need be on the fresh air too, spending the day outside the
house
.

First of all
, Internet is an amazing tool to expanding knowledge,
as well
as playing games and
be connected
with
other
people
. Children can enjoy their free moments and learning
a lot of
new subjects using a computer with an adult supervision in all cases.
For instance
, when I was young I
really
wanted to know everything about dinosaurs,
thus
I did not have the possibility to
buy
dinosaur history books
because
they were too expensive.
Fortunately
, I could
get
plenty
of information using my computer and looking for amazing drawings of them.

On the
other
hand, being all and every day watching a screen is not the best
idea
, and it can bring
negative
effects on kids. Children need to go outside, enjoy the nature, such as a park, and playing games with others face to face.
For example
, my brother
usually
spent a long time using
these kind
of devices, and the final result was that he lost his friends from school
because
he never had space to going around or hanging up with them.

To sum up, technology can be both beneficial and prejudicial to
little
ones. The key is making a balance between using a computer and stay outside doing
other
activities. Parents should be aware about that, and,
furthermore
, they
must
supervise their offspring when they are using devices to control the time.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Using a computer every day can have more negative than positive effects on children. v. 6

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
283 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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