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Usage of phone should be ban in classroom, Do you agree or disagree.

Usage of phone should be ban in classroom, dlaO2
Think of student around the world always using their phone while studying. In the past, people more focused to learning in their classes. Therefore, children in the past that mobile phones had a good grades. This essay will argue that mobile phones should be banned in classroom. First of all, student need to pay attention with their subjects. Nowadays, a lot of children in aged lower than 20 yearsold, they are addicted with mobile phone. Furthermore, they will participate less and pay attention less. For example, in former when teacher give sludent a free time, they spended their freetime reading many books. Consequently, It make people get more knowledge. However, student in present need to spending classes or books more than mobile phone. Secondly, mobile phone can disturb to teacher and students. Some of the school does not had a policy to turn off the mobile phone before start a class. Consequently, the notification or phone calling are always make a noise. To focus with studying is very significant. Otherwise, a noise problem will be disturb to studying. In particular, mobile phone need to turn off before start a class to do not disturb to other people. On the other hand, mobile phone is helpful to student about their works. Many students are not good at foreigh languges and their mobile phone can help them a lot about vocabulary. whereas, students are communicate less with their teacher. In the past, students are very like to communication with their teacher. For example, when they don't know meaning of the word, they will ask their teacher to help them, but nowadays student choose the way to ask a question with their phone more than their teacher. . Consequently, a relationship between student and teacher are break down. Student should communicate ask their teacher more. To conclude. mobile phones are not necessary for student when their in the class. They need to focus on the major, mobile phone can make them lose focus and they need to find a answer with their teacher more than their phone. If the result come out not as expected, teachers should make some game or somethings fun to make student will want to pay attention with their classes.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Think
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
around the world always using their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
while studying. In the past,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
more focused to learning in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
.
Therefore
, children in the past that mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
had a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
grades. This essay will argue that mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
should
be banned
in classroom.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to pay attention with their subjects. Nowadays,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
children in aged lower than 20
Possible spelling mistake found.
yearsold
, they
are addicted
with mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
.
Furthermore
, they will participate less and pay attention less.
For example
, in former when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teacher
give
Possible spelling mistake found.
sludent
a free time, they
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "spent", the past tense form of the verb 'spend'?
spended
their
Possible spelling mistake found.
freetime
reading
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
books.
Consequently
, It
Did you mean "makes"?
make
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
more knowledge.
However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
in present
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to spending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
or books more than mobile phone.

Secondly
, mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
can disturb to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teacher
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
of
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
the


This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
school
does not
The verb 'does' requires base form of the verb: "have"
had
a policy to turn off the mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
.
Consequently
, the notification or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
calling are always
Consider using a past participle here: "made".
make
a noise. To focus

with studying is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
significant.
Otherwise
, a noise problem will be
Consider using the past participle "disturbed"?
disturb
to studying.
In particular
, mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to turn off
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
to do not disturb to

other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

On the other hand
, mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
is helpful to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
about their works.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
at
Possible spelling mistake found.
foreigh
Possible spelling mistake found.
languges
and their mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them a lot about

vocabulary.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
whereas
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are
Consider using a past participle here: "communicated".
communicate
less with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teacher
. In the past,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
like to communication with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teacher
.
For example
, when they don't know meaning of the word, they will ask their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teacher
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
nowadays
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
choose the way to ask a question with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
more than their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teacher
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Consequently
, a relationship between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teacher
are break down.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Student
should communicate ask their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teacher
more.

To conclude
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
are not necessary for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
when their in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
. They
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to focus on the major, mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
them lose
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
focus and
they need

to find
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
answer with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teacher
more than their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
. If the result
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
out not as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expected
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
game or somethings fun to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
will

want to pay attention with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
.
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IELTS essay Usage of phone should be ban in classroom,

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
371 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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