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University students are increasingly studying abroad

University students are increasingly studying abroad 0pepl
Everyone has a desire to go and to study abroad. Getting very popular to obtain degree in a foreign country, the students of higher institutions could decide. While studying in a foreign country can support huge career in future, sicking home is a big challenge for many students. In my opinion, despite the challenges the students might face, they will gain valuable experience which help them later in their life. The basic benefit of studying in a foreign country is an opportunity to gain knowledge and experience for their career, besides they live independent from parents. In this case they should decide all necessary things for yourself. For example, they are responsible cooking, washing, doing shopping even paying bills. Moving abroad some students feel home sickness, that it will be affected their education and they can not concentrate on the studies. For example, it is much more difficult eating own national food abroad and they miss their mothers cooked meal. We know that when the statesman Babur went to India, he took a baker from Samarkand. In conclusion, choosing to study abroad is dramatically risen and many students get degree there. I believe, the advantage of gaining career outweigh its drawbacks.
Everyone has a desire to go and to study
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
abroad
. Getting
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
popular to obtain degree in a foreign country, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
of higher institutions could decide. While studying in a foreign country can support huge career
Did you mean: "in the future"?
in future
, sicking home is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
challenge for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
. In my opinion, despite the challenges the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
might face, they will gain valuable experience which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them later in their life.

The basic benefit of studying in a foreign country is an opportunity to gain knowledge and experience for their career,
besides
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
The usual collocation for "independent" is "of" not "from". Did you mean "independent of"?
independent from
parents.
In this case
they should decide all necessary things for yourself.
For example
, they are responsible cooking, washing,
The usual collocation for an activity ending in "-ing" is "go" not "do" or "play." Revise: "going shopping".
doing shopping
even paying bills.

Moving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
abroad
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
feel home sickness, that it will be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
their
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
education and
they can not concentrate on the studies.
For example
, it is much more difficult eating
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
national food
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
abroad and
they miss their mothers cooked meal. We know that when the statesman
Possible spelling mistake found.
Babur
went to India, he took a baker from Samarkand.

In conclusion
, choosing to study
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
abroad
is
dramatically
risen and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
degree there. I believe, the advantage of gaining career outweigh its drawbacks.
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IELTS essay University students are increasingly studying abroad

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
201 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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