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Traditional schooling is out of date, boring and stifles a child’s natural talents, various professionals have pushed for an education revolution. Are there alternatives in the education system? Is traditional education doing more harm than good?

Traditional schooling is out of date, boring and stifles a child’s natural talents, various professionals have pushed for an education revolution. Are there alternatives in the education system? Is traditional education doing more harm than good? BJJjp
Education system is a biggest issue in the world. There are many countries use the traditional method of the education which is old fashioned and pupils get unsatisfied with the education system. On other hand, Other countries use the modern way of techniques in education such as vocational courses and some practical education for students. I agree with this statement, old education system is more negative impact on student’s mind. My justification will be discussed in ensuring paragraph. To begin with, there are many countries change their education methods such as they add many vocational courses and give practical knowledge of the particular subjects so that youngsters understand very easily. Moreover, some of the countries such as United Kingdom and Canada give more technical knowledge in the particular subjects rather than India. For Instance, in United Kingdome and America they are use the more vocation courses for the children while they gather more practical knowledge and then they can not suffer in their future work. On the opposite side, Old fashion education techniques are use many countries such as India, Nepal and under developed countries. Many of the students dropped their education because of that. However, many children gain only theorical knowledge after that study they will be face difficulties in their work because practical work are very different than thoracal education. For give an example, nowadays, in India most of the youngster immigrant to other countries for education because they gain a practical and technical knowledge of the subjects. To Conclude, education systems are requiring changes as per new generation. Many countries adopted the new method of the education but some of the countries not change the traditional way of education. Hence, students get more knowledge of the subject not only from theory but also practical knowledge.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Education
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
is
Use "the" with the superlative.
a
biggest issue in the world. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the traditional method of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
which is
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
old fashioned
and pupils
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
unsatisfied with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
. On other hand, Other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the modern way of techniques in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
such as vocational courses and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
practical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this statement,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
is more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impact on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student’s
mind. My justification will
be discussed
in ensuring paragraph.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
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countries
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change
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
methods such as they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
vocational courses and give
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
practical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
of the particular subjects
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that youngsters understand
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
easily
.
Moreover
,
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
such
A determiner is probably missing here: "as the United Kingdom".
as United Kingdom
and Canada give more technical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
in the particular subjects
rather
than India.
For Instance
, in United
Possible spelling mistake found.
Kingdome
and America they are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the more vocation courses for the children while they gather more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
practical
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
knowledge and
Did you mean "than"?
then
they can not suffer in their future work.

On the opposite side,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Old
fashion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
techniques are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
such as India, Nepal and under developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
dropped their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of that.
However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
children gain
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
Possible spelling mistake found.
theorical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
after that study they will be face difficulties in their work
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
practical
work are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
Did you mean 'different "from"? 'Different than' is often considered colloquial style.
than
Possible spelling mistake found.
thoracal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
. For give an example, nowadays, in India most of the youngster immigrant to other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they gain a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
practical
and technical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
of the subjects.

To Conclude
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
systems
are requiring
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
as per new generation.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
adopted the new method of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
the traditional way of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
.
Hence
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
of the subject not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
from theory
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
practical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
.
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IELTS essay Traditional schooling is out of date, boring and stifles a child’s natural talents, various professionals have pushed for an education revolution. Are there alternatives in the education system? Is traditional education doing more harm than good?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
298 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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