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TPO45Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? In the past, young people depended too much on their parents to make decisions for them; today young people are better able to make decisions about their own lives. Use specific reasons and example v.1

TPO45 In the past, young people depended too much on their parents to make decisions for them; today young people are better able to make decisions about their own lives. Use specific reasons and example v. 1
Tourism has become the leading industry across the world. Some argue that this industry leads to conflicts among people coming from different nations. I disagree with this notion to a significant extent, and in the following I will give reasons to shed light on the enhanced understanding among people as a result of tourism. On the one hand, it is true that cultural diversification across the globe can cause some sort of misunderstandings. As an illustration, consider the differences in the body language of people living in different places. While an expression that is a sign of respect in one area, it can be interpreted as being offensive in another place. However, it is highly unlikely that such differences would cause tensions, because nowadays people are more informed thanks to the globalization; therefore, being open-minded results in more toleration. On the other hand, it is evident that tourism has made people closer together, simply by considering the way tourists are welcomed in different places. For instance, international restaurants are ubiquitous in every country, offering ethnic foods of numerous nations. According to some experts, the increased number of such restaurants is a reflective of the raised understanding. That is to say, local people are more aware of the fundamental requirements of the visitors, and are making great effort to create one-of-a-kind experiences for them. In conclusion, although some misunderstandings are likely to stem from discrepancies in the cultural values of different nations, it is beyond dispute that tourism has contributed to better understanding across the world.
Tourism has become the leading industry across the world.
Some
argue that this industry leads to conflicts among
people
coming from
different
nations. I disagree with this notion to a significant extent, and in the following I will give reasons to shed light on the enhanced understanding among
people
as a result
of tourism.

On the one hand, it is true that cultural diversification across the globe can cause
some
sort of misunderstandings. As an illustration, consider the differences in the body language of
people
living in
different
places. While an expression
that is
a
sign
of respect in one area, it can
be interpreted
as being offensive in another place.
However
, it is
highly
unlikely that such differences would cause tensions,
because
nowadays
people
are more informed thanks to the globalization;
therefore
, being open-minded results in more toleration.

On the other hand
, it is evident that tourism has made
people
closer together,
simply
by considering the way tourists
are welcomed
in
different
places.
For instance
, international restaurants are ubiquitous in every country, offering ethnic foods of numerous nations. According to
some
experts, the increased number of such restaurants is
a reflective of
the raised understanding.
That is
to say, local
people
are more aware of the fundamental requirements of the visitors, and are making great effort to create one-of-a-kind experiences for them.

In conclusion
, although
some
misunderstandings are likely to stem from discrepancies in the cultural values of
different
nations, it is beyond dispute that tourism has contributed to better understanding across the world.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
A special kind of beauty exists which is born in language, of language, and for language.
Gaston Bachelard

IELTS essay TPO45 In the past, young people depended too much on their parents to make decisions for them; today young people are better able to make decisions about their own lives. Use specific reasons and example v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
255 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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