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tpo36-2Some people buy food that is already prepared. Other people buy fresh food and prepare meals themselves. Which do you prefer? Explain why, using details and examples in your answer. v.1

tpo36-2Some people buy food that is already prepared. Other people buy fresh food and prepare meals themselves. Which do you prefer? Explain why, using details and examples in your answer. v. 1
In recent years, mobile phones have almost transformed the lives of everyone on the planet. They have made communication easy and flexible, and also business made so convenient among people across the world. But, there are some drawbacks as well in connection with medical and social issues. I think the benefits outweigh the negativity of using mobile phones. In this essay, I will give both the merits and demerits of the mobile phone. In this contemporary era, due to the expanding the use of phones among every individual become so common and grown its benefits. It’s not only used to communicate but also have a plethora other features like using the internet, buying or selling things, playing games and using emails, and many more which can be used for business purposes and personnel too. Although people use to have a separate connection for the internet, these days it is found that there is less broadband in the homes while hotspot from the mobile is commonly used. For example, for numerous companies phone has become the mode of income, as there are using for selling all their products through the mobile phone app. On the other hand, it has its own disadvantages. As there are a plethora of advantages, people use mobile phones most of the time. Keeping powerful device and its transmitting waves near the ears will be dangerous for heavy users. Using phones for a longer period of time can lead to many medical problems. For instance, a person can suffer from mental problems and diseases like cancers. It also has numerous bad effects on social life, as it disconnecting the interaction between individuals. For example, many people at home will talk to each other using a phone, which does not give them quality time to spend. In conclusion, even though the mobile phone has some drawbacks, it is more beneficial for day to day life. So, use it in the way that it does not affect your health and social life.
In recent years, mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
have almost transformed the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
of everyone on the planet. They have made communication easy and flexible, and
also
business made
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
convenient among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
across the world.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
drawbacks
as well
in connection with medical and social issues. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
the benefits outweigh the negativity of using mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
. In this essay, I will give both the merits and demerits of the mobile phone.

In this contemporary era, due to the expanding the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
among every individual become
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
common and grown its benefits. It’s not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to communicate
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
have a plethora other features like using the internet, buying or selling things, playing games and using emails, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
more which can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for business purposes and personnel too. Although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
Make sure that 'use to' is correct. For habitual actions in the past or to mean 'accustomed to', use "used to".
use to
have a separate connection for the internet, these days it
is found
that there is less broadband in the homes while hotspot from the mobile is
commonly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
.
For example
, for numerous
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
has become the mode of income, as there are using for selling all their products through the mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
app.

On the other hand
, it has its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
disadvantages. As there are a plethora of advantages,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
most of the time. Keeping powerful device and its transmitting waves near the ears will be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
for heavy users. Using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
for a longer period of time can lead to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
medical problems.
For instance
, a person can suffer from mental problems and diseases like cancers. It
also
has numerous
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
effects on social life, as it disconnecting the interaction between individuals.
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
at home will talk to each other using a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
, which does not give them quality time to spend.

In conclusion
,
even though
the mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
drawbacks, it is more beneficial for day to day life.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
it in the way that it does not affect your health and social life.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay tpo36-2Some people buy food that is already prepared. Other people buy fresh food and prepare meals themselves. Which do you prefer? Explain why, using details and examples in your answer. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
333 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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