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TPO 46 Integrated Writing Task In the United States medical information about patients traditionally has been recorded and stored on paper forms However there are efforts to persuade doctors to adopt electronic medical record systems in which informa

TPO 46 Integrated Writing Task In the United States medical information about patients traditionally has been recorded and stored on paper forms However there are efforts to persuade doctors to adopt electronic medical record systems in which informa xmPDb
The reading and the article are both contradicting each other, in terms of whether the electronic system is better than a traditional paper writing system to keep medical records. More specifically, the writer discusses various benefits of using electronic systems to keep medical records in the medical field. However, the lecture in the listening passage refutes the mentioned hypothesis and provides some evidence to negate them. According to the article, the first dispute focuses on that using an electronic system that would help to reduce the cost of faxing, copying, and transferring data since it can be accessed from anywhere, and it does not demand space for storing data. Nonetheless, the speaker rebuts the argument presented in the article. Furthermore, she declares that doctors who utilize electronic systems would continue to use the traditional paper systems in case of an emergency loss of database from electronic devices. Hence, it will add up a cost and would not be an effective solution. Moreover, another topic highlights that having unique forms and fonts in the electronic system would further mitigate the possibility of human errors. Nevertheless, the narrator undermines this by asserting that even though adapting the electronic system, doctors like to use papers while writing prescriptions and notes. Moreover, the medical staff is responsible for making errors since they need to transfer all patient’s details in the computer system, and thereby, they might continue making mistakes due to the poor handwriting of doctors. Consequently, it will not eliminate the original issue anyway. Finally, the text explains that adapting the latest electronic system enables researchers to have access to patient's information from anywhere in the world which make it easy to carry research project for them. On the contrary, the penman again opposes the theory and describes that it is not easy to access patient’s private information since all these pieces of information are maintained under strict privacy regulations in most parts of the United States. Thus, researchers must have to follow various complicated procedures to obtain such pieces of information, and in fact, most patients do not want to be a part of this research and block their private information.
The reading and the article are both contradicting each other, in terms of whether the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
electronic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
is better than a traditional paper writing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
records. More
specifically
, the writer discusses various benefits of using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
electronic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
systems
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
records in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
field.
However
, the lecture in the listening passage refutes the mentioned hypothesis and provides
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
evidence to negate them.

According to the article, the
first
dispute focuses on that using an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
electronic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
that would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the cost of faxing, copying, and transferring data since it can
be accessed
from anywhere, and it does not demand space for storing data. Nonetheless, the speaker rebuts the argument presented in the article.
Furthermore
, she declares that doctors who utilize
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
electronic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
systems
would continue to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the traditional paper
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
systems
in case of an emergency loss of database from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
electronic
devices.
Hence
, it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
up a cost and would not be an effective solution.

Moreover
, another topic highlights that having unique forms and fonts in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
electronic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
would
further
mitigate the possibility of human errors.
Nevertheless
, the narrator undermines this by asserting that
even though
adapting the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
electronic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
, doctors like to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
papers while writing prescriptions and notes.
Moreover
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
staff is responsible for making errors since they need to transfer all patient’s
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
in the computer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
, and thereby, they might continue making mistakes due to the poor handwriting of doctors.
Consequently
, it will not eliminate the original issue anyway.

Finally
, the text
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explains
that adapting the latest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
electronic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
enables researchers to have access to patient's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
from anywhere in the world which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it easy to carry research project for them.
On the contrary
, the penman again opposes the theory and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
describes
that it is not easy to access patient’s private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
since all these pieces of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
are maintained
under strict privacy regulations in most parts of the United States.
Thus
, researchers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
follow various complicated procedures to obtain such pieces of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
, and in fact, most patients do not want to be a part of this research and block their private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
.
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IELTS essay TPO 46 Integrated Writing Task In the United States medical information about patients traditionally has been recorded and stored on paper forms However there are efforts to persuade doctors to adopt electronic medical record systems in which informa

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
359 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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