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TPO-17 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Most advertisements make products seem much better then they really are. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v.2

TPO-17 - Independent Writing Task Most advertisements make products seem much better then they really are. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 2
Without a shadow of the doubt advertisements play a vital role in introducing new products to community. Companies by spending money in the market of adverticement can persuade people to by these stuff. Some prople contend that most advertisements make products seem much better than they really are, while others assert it is not true. Both of the opposing arguments appear to be somewhat convincing and stand to point. However, my personal experience and actual observation of life have led me to agree that advertisements are very influential in making products look like better than they really are. In theensuing lines, I delve into my reasons to substantiate my point. The first an possibily the paramount reason is that advertisement companies use fancy items, famous actors, and even cartoon characters to introduce the products. Most of the time, if people are interested in these actors or characters, they will absorb to by these products. So, the more money you spend in advertising your product, the greater customers you will have. As a result, advertisements are a key to companies. Another point springing to the mind is that there is apossibility that kids and teenaager watch these advertisement. Furthermore, advertisemen companies use fictional items in their progframs to make them eye-catching. So, kids and teenager cannot distinguish between the reality and fiction. As a result, they think these stuff are useful things but they are not. For example, last day I saw an advertisement in the television about candies which are very harmful for children. They cause bad effects in chidren' s tooth. This advertisement was full of fairy tails and my kid really like those tiny fairy tails. It was too hard for me to explain that candies could cause serious damage. Consequently, advertisements are just used to making money and most of the time the products are not valuable things. To sum it all up, it is easy to see that advertisement companies use various elements to make their advertisements nicer and also kids cannot understand that these products are not good things to buu them. Therefore, these advertisement are just tools to absorb people and make more money.
Without a shadow of the doubt
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
play a vital role in introducing new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
to community.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Companies
by spending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
in the market of
Possible spelling mistake found.
adverticement
can persuade
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to by these stuff.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
Possible spelling mistake found.
prople
contend that most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
seem much better than they
really
are, while others assert it is not true. Both of the opposing arguments appear to be somewhat convincing and stand to point.
However
, my personal experience and actual observation of life have led me to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
influential in making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
look like better than they
really
are. In
Possible spelling mistake found.
theensuing
lines, I delve into my reasons to substantiate my point.

The
first
Use "a" instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
an
Possible spelling mistake found.
possibily
the paramount reason is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
fancy items,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
actors, and even cartoon characters to introduce the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
. Most of the time, if
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are interested
in these actors or characters, they will absorb to by these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, the more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
you spend in advertising your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
, the greater customers you will have.
As a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
are a key to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
.

Another point springing to the mind is that there is
Possible spelling mistake found.
apossibility
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
and
Possible spelling mistake found.
teenaager
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
.
Furthermore
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
advertisemen
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
fictional items in their
Possible spelling mistake found.
progframs
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
them eye-catching.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenager
cannot distinguish between the reality and fiction.
As a result
, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
these stuff are useful things
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they are not.
For example
, last day I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
The usual collocation for technology is "on," not "in." It is better to say this: "on the television".
in the television
about candies which are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
harmful for children. They cause
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
effects in
Possible spelling mistake found.
chidren&
#039; s tooth. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
was full of fairy tails and my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kid
really
like those tiny fairy tails. It was too
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
for me to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
that candies could cause serious damage.
Consequently
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
and most of the time the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
are not valuable things.

To sum it all up, it is easy to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
various elements to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
nicer and
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
cannot understand that these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
are not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
things to
Possible spelling mistake found.
buu
them.
Therefore
, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
tools to absorb
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
36Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
15Mistakes

IELTS essay TPO-17 - Independent Writing Task Most advertisements make products seem much better then they really are. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
360 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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