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TPO 10 - Q 6Using the points from the lecture, explain why researchers think that babies may feel empathy. v.1

TPO 10 - Q 6Using the points from the lecture, explain why researchers think that babies may feel empathy. v. 1
Nowadays, people would rather eat fast food than traditional food due to a fast-paced way of living. There are several advantages of eating fast food, such as availability and taste. Nonetheless, the health problems disadvantages suppress all the advantages On one hand, fast food is highly available in cities, and is usually appealling our taste for sugar and fat. For instance, it is not hard to find plenty of options on fast food restaurants in urban areas. Also, this kind of food is not expensive and can have discounts if bought in quantity. In addition, fast food can be tasteful sandwiches or pizzas what keeps people eating more and more of it. Therefore, fast food is more than convenient for the fast modern society. On the other hand, since fast food is high in calories, they can be linked to obesity. Consequently, several health problems may arise from eating fast food in quantity. As an example, not only heart diseases, but cancer also have shown some correlation with obesity. On top of that, not all nutrients needed for a healthy life can be found on fast food meals. To illustrate, vitamins are essential for many body process and several of them are missing in a fast food based diet. In conclusion, fast food can be tasteful and convenient for the fast-paced modern lives; however, that convenience comes at a high cost of heart diseases and a diet with a lack of nutrients. Thus, the advantages do not outweigh the disadvantages.
Nowadays,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
would
rather
eat
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
than traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
due to a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
-paced way of living. There are several advantages of eating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
, such as availability and taste. Nonetheless, the health problems disadvantages suppress all the advantages

On one hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
is
highly
available in cities, and is
usually
Possible spelling mistake found.
appealling
our taste for sugar and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fat
.
For instance
, it is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to find
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of options on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
restaurants in urban areas.
Also
, this kind of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
is not expensive and can have discounts if
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
in quantity.
In addition
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
can be tasteful sandwiches or pizzas what
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keeps
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
eating more and more of it.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
is more than convenient for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
modern society.

On the other hand
, since
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
is high in calories, they can
be linked
to obesity.
Consequently
, several health problems may arise from eating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
in quantity. As an example, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
heart diseases,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
cancer
also
have shown
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
correlation with obesity.
On top of that
, not all nutrients needed for a healthy life can
be found
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
meals. To illustrate, vitamins are essential for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
body process and several of them are missing in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
based diet.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
can be tasteful and convenient for the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
-paced modern
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
;
however
, that convenience
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
at a high cost of heart diseases and a diet with a lack of nutrients.
Thus
, the advantages do not outweigh the disadvantages.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
Do you know what a foreign accent is? It’s a sign of bravery.
Amy Chua

IELTS essay TPO 10 - Q 6Using the points from the lecture, explain why researchers think that babies may feel empathy. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
250 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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