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TOPIC: THE RANGE OF TECHNOLOGY AVAILABLE TO PEOPLE IS INCREASING THE GAP BETWEEN THE RICH AND THE POOR. TO WHAT EXTENT DO YOU AGREE OR DISAGREE?

TOPIC: THE RANGE OF TECHNOLOGY AVAILABLE TO PEOPLE IS INCREASING THE GAP BETWEEN THE RICH AND THE POOR. lRW3b
It is universally accepted that recent decades have witnessed radical changes in humanity’s lives thanks to technological advancements. However, the public still remains divided on the influences that technology has on our lives, particularly when it comes to income disparity. Some people are of the opinion that having technological innovations at our disposal is the main driver behind the prevalent wealth gap. Although this argument is judicious to some extent, I strongly believe that the significant role of technology could not be discounted. On the one hand, some people are proposing that technology developments are to blame for widening the increasingly gap between the rich and the poor, and justifiably so. The key rationale in favor of this view is that technological advancements have made certain groups who are already prosperous become exponentially richer compared to others. For example, the past decades have seen what once were humble technology startups morph into massive multi-billion-dollar enterprises. Consequently, the owners of those big businesses have amassed great wealth and gone on to become social elites. This, however, does not happen to most common people who have low financial ability. On the other hand, the belief that technology is merely conducive to the one percent seems to be an overly grim view. As a matter of fact, clear examples about how the technological innovations have lifted innumerable lives out of poverty, are universally omnipresent. For instance, scores of city dwellers now owe their livelihoods to Grab’s heiling network, of which operation is based on advanced technology. This is a powerful testament to how technological growth has improved the impoverished inhabitants’ living standards and bridged social inequality. In conclusion, while technology breakthroughs would bring a number of merits to the affluent, it seems to me that the range of technology is far more beneficial for the destitute to escape poverty.
It is
universally
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
accepted
that recent decades have witnessed radical
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in humanity’s
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
thanks to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technological
advancements.
However
, the public
still
remains divided on the influences that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
has on our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
,
particularly
when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to income disparity.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are of the opinion that having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technological
innovations at our disposal is the main driver behind the prevalent wealth gap. Although this argument is judicious to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
extent, I
strongly
believe that the significant role of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
could not
be discounted
.

On the one hand,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are proposing that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
developments are to blame for widening the
increasingly
gap between the rich and the poor, and
justifiably
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
. The key rationale in favor of this view is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technological
advancements have made certain groups who are already prosperous become
exponentially
richer compared to others.
For example
, the past decades have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
what once were humble
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
startups morph into massive multi-billion-dollar enterprises.
Consequently
, the owners of those
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
businesses have amassed great wealth and gone on to become social elites. This,
however
, does not happen to most common
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who have low financial ability.

On the other hand
, the belief that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
is
merely
conducive to the one percent seems to be an
overly
grim view. As a matter of fact,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
examples about how the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technological
innovations have lifted innumerable
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
out of poverty, are
universally
omnipresent.
For instance
, scores of city dwellers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
owe their livelihoods to Grab’s
Possible spelling mistake found.
heiling
network, of which operation
is based
on advanced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
. This is a powerful testament to how
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technological
growth has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
the impoverished inhabitants’ living standards and bridged social inequality.

In conclusion
, while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
breakthroughs would bring a number of merits to the affluent, it seems to me that the range of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
is far more beneficial for the destitute to escape poverty.
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IELTS essay TOPIC: THE RANGE OF TECHNOLOGY AVAILABLE TO PEOPLE IS INCREASING THE GAP BETWEEN THE RICH AND THE POOR.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
306 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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