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TOPIC # 36 Choose one of the following transportation vehicles and explain why you think it has changed people’s lives. (Automobiles, bicycles, airplanes) v.2

TOPIC # 36 Choose one of the following transportation vehicles and explain why you think it has changed people’s lives. (Automobiles, bicycles, airplanes) v. 2
In today’s societies, the question of which of the automobiles, bicycles, or airplanes transportation has an important effect on people’s lives has become a controversial issue among people in many circles and camps. Different people have various types of responses to this topic based on their cultural, social, or even familial backgrounds. However, as far as I am concerned, I think that airplane transportation causes more changes in human’s life for some reasons that I elaborate them in the following paragraphs. To begin with, the first thing immediately comes to mind is that airplanes transportation reduce the time of the travel noticeably. In other words, people can expeditiously travel to many places throughout the world just in few hours. Accordingly, not only they can see more places in the world but also they can accustom to diverse types of traditions. Therefore, They feel much happiness as well as satisfaction in their life. Let us make a brief explanation about that. According to the research that was conducted in Tehran University, Scientists found out that as long as the people use aerial transportation system, their tendency toward distant traveling increases significantly. In addition, they have more interested to read about different customs in the world. Another noteworthy aspect that should be mentioned is that airplanes changed the business plans of many enterprises. In fact, this vehicle helps business to broaden their activities because their manager can easily attend in each place throughout the world. So, people can access the various brands from any country. Hence, they can choose and use better and more suitable products as well as services. Let me shed a light on my point. According to the information that was published in the authentic website, the quality of services and products ameliorate remarkably in most of the countries as far as a plenty of company can attend in many countries around the world because of airplanes. In conclusion, there are numerous of reasons to show that airplane brings about a lot of advantages in human’s life. This transportation system helps people to travel easily and conveniently throughout the world and also provides better services and commodities for people. Thus, it is legitimate that any person the airplane as an important invention in people’s lives.
In
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s societies, the question of which of the automobiles, bicycles, or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
airplanes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
has an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
effect on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
has become a controversial issue among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
circles and camps.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have various types of responses to this topic based on their cultural, social, or even familial backgrounds.
However
, as far as I
am concerned
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
airplane
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
causes more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in human’s life for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
reasons that I elaborate them in the following paragraphs.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, the
first
thing immediately
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to mind is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
airplanes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the time of the travel
noticeably
.
In other words
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
expeditiously
travel to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
places throughout the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
in few hours.
Accordingly
, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
more places in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
they can accustom to diverse types of traditions.
Therefore
, They feel much happiness
as well
as satisfaction in their life.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Let
us
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a brief explanation about that. According to the research that
was conducted
in Tehran University, Scientists found out that as long as the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
aerial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
system, their tendency toward distant traveling increases
significantly
.
In addition
, they have more interested to read about
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
customs in the world.

Another noteworthy aspect that should
be mentioned
is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
airplanes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
the business plans of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
enterprises. In fact, this vehicle
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
business to broaden their activities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
their manager can
easily
attend in each place throughout the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can access the various brands from any country.
Hence
, they can choose and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
better and more suitable products
as well
as services.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Let
me shed a light on my point. According to the information that
was published
in the authentic website, the quality of services and products ameliorate
remarkably
in most of the countries as far as a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
can attend in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries around the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of airplanes.

In conclusion
, there are numerous of reasons to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
airplane
brings about
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
advantages in human’s life. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
system
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to travel
easily
and
conveniently
throughout the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
and
also
provides better services and commodities for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
Thus
, it is legitimate that any person the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
airplane
as an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
invention in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
19Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
25Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes

IELTS essay TOPIC # 36 Choose one of the following transportation vehicles and explain why you think it has changed people’s lives. (Automobiles, bicycles, airplanes) v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
376 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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