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Topic 2: Do you want to work in Vietnam or in another country when you grow up? ( 75 - 150 words)

Topic 2: Do you want to work in Vietnam or in another country when you grow up? ( 75 - 150 words) 2KrAo
The trend of working oversea has increased recently. Although working in another country may have some culture shocks at first, it unquestionably brings me numerous chances to broaden my mind. In my opinion, working in foreign country will absolutely enhance my self-reliance if I go abroad by myself. For example, I am not only do the household chores on my own, but also learn how to cook. On top of that, I can keep on good terms with international colleagues come from all over the world as well as enrich my knowledge about cutural diversity from them. Last but not least, working in another country is an ideal environment for me to develop myself and helps me achieve better living conditions. With these in mind, I believe that working abroad is benefical. Although it has some difficulties, it doesn’t matter.
The trend of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
oversea has increased recently. Although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
in another country may have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
culture shocks at
first
, it
unquestionably
brings me numerous chances to broaden my mind. In my opinion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
in foreign country will
absolutely
enhance my self-reliance if I go abroad by myself.
For example
, I am not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
do the household chores on my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
learn how to cook.
On top of that
, I can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
on
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
terms with international colleagues
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
from all over the world
as well
as enrich my knowledge about
Possible spelling mistake found.
cutural
diversity from them. Last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not least,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
in another country is an ideal environment for me to develop myself and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
me achieve better living conditions. With these in mind, I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
abroad is
Possible spelling mistake found.
benefical
. Although it has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
difficulties, it doesn’t matter.
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IELTS essay Topic 2: Do you want to work in Vietnam or in another country when you grow up? ( 75 - 150 words)

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
140 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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