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Today, most people get married and give birth in their thirties rather than when they are younger. Is it a positive or negative development in your opinion? To what extent do you support this development? v.2

Today, most people get married and give birth in their thirties rather than when they are younger. Is it a positive or negative development in your opinion? v. 2
Marriage and childbirth are clearly among the most pivotal matters since they place a heavy importance on each individual’s life. In the contemporary day and age, despite controversial perspectives, the idea of getting married and giving birth in their thirties becomes more and more ubiquitous due to various facets. I strongly concur with the statement that this growing action leads to a positive development in our society. First of all, building a family requires loads of preparations in mental-related issues and working schedule as it may cause unexpected tensions and nameless chores. The majority of people in their thirties have settled in their career with fiscal stability or at least finished their college years with obligatory certifications to support their future which helps forestall overworking in marriage life. In addition, the older people are, the more maturity and perception they have. With daily news, numerous situations in which the couples have to quit their jobs or study to raise their kids are easily spotted because of lack of acknowledgement about the consequence of getting married early. As people gain a better understanding about their word, they are straightforwardly responsible for their children upbringing and have more experience to nurture the kids in a moral and scientific way. Secondly, in spite of the fact that older mothers may suffer a miscarriage, high blood pressure, gestational diabetes and the children are at higher risk of DOWN Syndrome, pregnancy after the age of thirty reduces health risks thanks to their bodies being fully grown and appropriate for childbearing. Researchers at the University of Southern California have stated that women who bear children in their 30s face a lower probability of uterus cancer compared to those in their mid-twenties. Moreover, having babies late also spell longevity of the mother as a result of recent studies, which marks a significant benefit in personal and marital life. In conclusion, establishing a family at a measurable old age has several advantages involving mental and health problems as highlighted before. Upward tendency towards the aforementioned action will be a suitable option for righteous kids raising and healthcare for families.
Marriage and childbirth are
clearly
among the most pivotal matters since they place a heavy importance on each individual’s life. In the contemporary day and age, despite controversial perspectives, the
idea
of getting married and giving birth in their thirties becomes more and more ubiquitous due to various facets. I
strongly
concur with the statement that this growing action leads to a
positive
development in our society.

First of all
, building a family requires loads of preparations in mental-related issues and working schedule as it may cause unexpected tensions and nameless chores. The majority of
people
in their thirties have settled in their career with fiscal stability or at least finished their college years with obligatory certifications to support their future which
helps
forestall overworking in marriage life.
In addition
, the older
people
are, the more maturity and perception they have. With daily news, numerous situations in which the couples
have to
quit their jobs or study to raise their kids are
easily
spotted
because
of lack of
acknowledgement
about the consequence of getting married early. As
people
gain a better understanding about their word, they are
straightforwardly
responsible for their children upbringing and have more experience to nurture the kids in a moral and scientific way.

Secondly
,
in spite of
the fact that older mothers may suffer a miscarriage, high blood pressure, gestational diabetes and the children are at higher
risk
of DOWN Syndrome, pregnancy after the age of thirty
reduces
health
risks
thanks to their bodies being
fully
grown and appropriate for childbearing. Researchers at the University of Southern California have stated that women who bear children in their 30s face a lower probability of uterus cancer compared to those in their mid-twenties.
Moreover
, having babies late
also
spell longevity of the mother
as a result
of recent studies, which marks a significant benefit in personal and
marital
life.

In conclusion
, establishing a family at a measurable
old
age has several advantages involving mental and health problems as highlighted
before
. Upward tendency towards the aforementioned action will be a suitable option for righteous kids raising and healthcare for families.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Today, most people get married and give birth in their thirties rather than when they are younger. Is it a positive or negative development in your opinion? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
351 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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