Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

TODAY MORE PEOPLE ARE TRAVELLING THAN EVER BEFORE. WHY IS THIS THE CASE? WHAT ARE THE BENEFITS OF TRAVELLING FOR THE TRAVELLERS? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words v.2

TODAY MORE PEOPLE ARE TRAVELLING THAN EVER BEFORE. WHY IS THIS THE CASE? WHAT ARE THE BENEFITS OF TRAVELLING FOR THE TRAVELLERS? v. 2
Nowadays, it is noticeable that the number of people travelling over the world has increased in comparison with the past. And without doubt, travelling is very useful. In this essay I will justify this rise in travelers` proportion and mention some advantages people can get from their travels. This first reason for the increase, can be flight prices. As it is much cheaper than before to the extent that it could be some times lower than other means of transport such as trains or buses. For example, a journey from Kuwait to Syria used to cost 300 pound 7 years ago, but now it only costs 70 pound to reach Syria from Kuwait. Consequently, travelling now is affordable for more people. Also, media at present is more influencer than before. Viewers are constantly watching tourist adverts on television, internet or social media which attracts them to visit these places. In terms of the benefits of travelling, they could be uncountable. Visiting new places and countries can broaden the horizon and widen the experience. This is because people are exposed to new environments, different cultures and a variety of customs and traditions. Encountering these experiences can make travelers more open-minded and intellectual. Furthermore, learning new languages during journeys is extremely beneficial, and being between the native speakers of the new language is a great opportunity to pick it up easily. For instance, my sister is multilingual now, with an ability to speak four languages, and the reason behind this is her passion for travelling and tourism. In conclusion, travelling can have a lot of positive impact on our lives, such as new experiences and languages acquisition. And people are increasingly travelling these days, because of the motivation of airline companies` offers and tourist promotion.
Nowadays, it is noticeable that the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelling
over the world has increased
in comparison
with the past. And without doubt,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelling
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
useful. In this essay I will justify this rise in travelers` proportion and mention
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
advantages
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
from their travels.

This
first
reason for the increase, can be flight prices. As it is much cheaper than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
to the extent that it could be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
times lower than other means of transport such as trains or buses.
For example
, a journey from Kuwait to Syria
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to cost
Writing for an international audience? Consider adding the metric equivalent.
300 pound
7 years ago,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
costs
Writing for an international audience? Consider adding the metric equivalent.
70 pound
to reach Syria from Kuwait.
Consequently
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelling
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
is affordable for more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
Also
, media at present is more influencer than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
. Viewers are
constantly
watching tourist adverts on television, internet or social media which attracts them to visit these places.

In terms of the benefits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelling
, they could be uncountable. Visiting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
places and countries can broaden the horizon and widen the experience. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are exposed
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
environments,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
cultures and a variety of customs and traditions. Encountering these experiences can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
travelers more open-minded and intellectual.
Furthermore
, learning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
during journeys is
extremely
beneficial, and being between the native speakers of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
is a great opportunity to pick it up
easily
.
For instance
, my sister is multilingual
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
, with an ability to speak four
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
, and the reason behind this is her passion for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelling
and tourism.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelling
can have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
impact on our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
, such as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
experiences and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
acquisition. And
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
increasingly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travelling
these days,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the motivation of airline
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
` offers and tourist promotion.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
21Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay TODAY MORE PEOPLE ARE TRAVELLING THAN EVER BEFORE. WHY IS THIS THE CASE? WHAT ARE THE BENEFITS OF TRAVELLING FOR THE TRAVELLERS? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
293 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts