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today more people are overweight that ever before . what are the cause and some solution ?

today more people are overweight that ever before. what are the cause and some solution? obE8b
the problem of overweight is rise day by day which was always debatable has more become more controversial with many people claiming that it is hazardous while other reject this notion. the substantial influence of this trend has sparked the controversy over the potential impact in recent year. in my opinion former proposition appears to be more rational. this essay will further elaborate the negative effects of this trend along with some remedies to solve this problem thus will a logical conclusion. there is myriad of reason which will further explain this argument but the most preponderant one stems from the fact that people prefer to fast food rather than home made food that why individuals face overweight problem. another pivotal aspect of this trend is that people not prefer to exercise this is big problem. hence, it is apparent why many are against this trend. steps to deal with this problem are many but the most significant once are not complicated but accessible and practicable. besides, if people do yoga they do not face overweight problem primarily, if masses prefer to homemade food they do not face any problem. according to the arguments aforementioned above, one can reach to a conclusion that the problem of overweight is rise day by day if people prefer to home made food and do a lot of exercise they do not face this problem can be successfully addressed, provided that the above stated measure are taken.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
of
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overweight
is rise day by day which was always debatable has more become more controversial with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
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people
claiming that it is hazardous while other reject this notion.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
the
substantial influence of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trend
has sparked the controversy over the potential impact in recent year.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
in
my opinion former proposition appears to be more rational.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
this
essay will
further
elaborate the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trend
along with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
remedies to solve this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
thus
will a logical conclusion.
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there
is myriad of reason which will
further
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
this argument
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the most preponderant one stems from the fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prefer
to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
rather
than home made
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
that why individuals
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face
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
overweight
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
.
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another
pivotal aspect of this
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trend
is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prefer
to exercise this is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
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problem
.
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hence
, it is apparent why
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many
are against this
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trend
.
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steps
to deal with this
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problem
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the most significant once are not complicated
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
accessible and practicable.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
besides
, if
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people
do yoga they do not
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face
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overweight
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
primarily
, if masses
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prefer
to homemade
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
they do not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
according
to the arguments aforementioned above, one can reach to a conclusion that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
overweight
is rise day by day if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prefer
to home made
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
and do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
exercise they do not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
can be
successfully
addressed, provided that the above stated measure
are taken
.
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IELTS essay today more people are overweight that ever before. what are the cause and some solution?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
243 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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