Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Today, many women work outside home. Do you think this could be beneficial or harmful to their children?

Today, many women work outside home. Do you think this could be beneficial or harmful to their children? r8a72
Perceived as half of the active labor force, women have adopted a prominent role in the social and economic development of human societies. This trend, although economically desirable, may have caused serious concerns among those people who believe that the social responsibility of mothers might inflict damage to their children in the course of time. From my perspective, the participation of a woman in society can benefit her children too, provided that certain points are taken into account. The modern world is characterized by women receiving higher education and occupying managerial positions, apart from their conventional duties to their family. Economically speaking, the working of a woman promotes the welfare of the family, and children are the ones who benefit the most. Such children can enroll in more extracurricular classes, enjoy a wider range of leisure activities and have the chance to travel more, all of which can contribute to their mental, intellectual and social growth. On the social side, a woman who interacts with society is far more likely to have the awareness required to raise children in today's world. This is specifically important in the present century when the lives of different generations have undergone dramatic changes. Those women who restrict themselves to household chores may be lacking in self-confidence when it comes to disciplining their teenagers, as they end up being accused of having no information about the conditions of the modern world. Hence, a decent social position can help mothers to have a more constructive interaction with children, whose outcome is better upbringing and fewer behavioral disorders among adolescents. There are, however, certain problems that may arise. Obviously, working women have less time to spend with their children, which can lead to frustration and dissatisfaction in the family. This matter assumes more importance when it comes to infants and children under five, who are desperately dependent on their mother. When at home, a woman having worked at least eight hours may have little, if any, energy to fulfil her maternal duties, a situation which has become even more complicated thanks to the advent of teleworking and the possibility to work at home. Having said that, these problems can be addressed, or minimized, if women receive enough support and training that would enable them to draw a sharp distinction between their private and social lives. Men appear to have a critical role here, because it is their understanding and cooperation that can help their wives to be socially active. Besides, many governments have adopted and implemented laws which support working women, such as long maternity leave, reduced working hours, early retirement and the provision of childcare facilities in the workplace. To sum up, without suggesting that the absence of mothers in the family is not a major cause for concern, I believe that a women can assume and perform her social roles, if supported by her family and the government. It should be remembered that women constitute half of the workforce, and spending all their time raising their family is illogical, wasteful and inconsistent with the long-term interests of society.
Perceived as half of the active labor force,
women
have adopted a prominent role in the
social
and economic development of human
societies
. This trend, although
economically
desirable, may have caused serious concerns among those
people
who
believe that the
social
responsibility of mothers might inflict damage to their
children
in the course of time. From my perspective, the participation of a
woman
in
society
can benefit her
children
too, provided that certain points
are taken
into account.

The modern world
is characterized
by
women
receiving higher education and occupying managerial positions, apart from their conventional duties to their
family
.
Economically
speaking, the
working
of a
woman
promotes the welfare of the
family
, and
children
are the ones
who
benefit the most. Such
children
can enroll in more extracurricular classes, enjoy a wider range of leisure activities and have the chance to travel more, all of which can contribute to their mental, intellectual and
social
growth. On the
social
side, a
woman
who
interacts with
society
is far more likely to have the awareness required to raise
children
in
today
's world. This is
specifically
important
in the present century when the
lives
of
different
generations have undergone dramatic
changes
. Those
women
who
restrict themselves to household chores may be lacking in self-confidence when it
comes
to disciplining their
teenagers
, as they
end
up
being accused
of having no information about the conditions of the modern world.
Hence
, a decent
social
position can
help
mothers to have a more constructive interaction with
children
, whose outcome is better upbringing and fewer behavioral disorders among adolescents.

There are,
however
, certain problems that may arise.
Obviously
,
working
women
have less time to spend with their
children
, which can lead to frustration and dissatisfaction in the
family
. This matter assumes more importance when it
comes
to infants and
children
under five,
who
are
desperately
dependent on their
mother
. When at home, a
woman
having worked at least eight hours may have
little
, if any, energy to fulfil her maternal duties, a situation which has become even more complicated thanks to the advent of teleworking and the possibility to work at home. Having said that, these problems can
be addressed
, or minimized, if
women
receive
enough
support and training that would enable them to draw a sharp distinction between their private and
social
lives
.
Men
appear to have a critical role here,
because
it is their understanding and cooperation that can
help
their wives to be
socially
active.
Besides
,
many
governments
have adopted and implemented laws which support
working
women
, such as long maternity
leave
,
reduced
working
hours, early retirement and the provision of childcare facilities in the workplace.

To sum up, without suggesting that the absence of mothers in the
family
is not a major cause for concern, I believe that a
women
can assume and perform her
social
roles, if supported by her
family
and the
government
. It should
be remembered
that
women
constitute half of the workforce, and spending all their time raising their
family
is illogical, wasteful and inconsistent with the long-term interests of
society
.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay Today, many women work outside home. Do you think this could be beneficial or harmful to their children?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
513 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts





Get more results for topic: