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To succeed in business, one needs to know math. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

To succeed in business, one needs to know math. 0XE5
In today’s competitive world, the rivalry is fierce in commerce which entails that business people should have specific characteristics to guarantee success. Consequently, it is often considered that merchants who have good knowledge of math have an edge over other traders. I completely concur with this notion and believe that arithmetic is beneficial in improving both soft and hard skills. To begin with, one predominant nuance which contributes to the merits of knowing mathematics is that it fosters soft skills. To put it differently, arithmetic lays the foundation of marketing by giving entrepreneurs and manufacturers insight into strategic thinking, time-management, and effective communication skills. To illustrate this, many independent studies carried out in developed and developing countries indicate that those industrialists who have majored in mathematics benefit from higher levels of creative and critical thinking. Besides, not only were they proved to be wiser decision makers but also quicker problem solvers. In addition, mathematical intelligence is one of the numerous kinds of intelligence introduced by Gardner as a determining factor which enables individuals develop their hard skills. That is to say, even ordinary people who are keen on this subject are more efficient in keeping accounts and marketing. To give one clear example, those undergraduates who pursue their tertiary education in marketing, financial and administrative management and accounting, should take math lessons in college and university. As a result, the tendency to integrate more hours of math into the pupils' curriculum has seemingly been on an upward trajectory. In conclusion, regarding this belief that knowing math can play a substantial role in helping traders strive for financial gains, I agree that possessing knowledge of math can be both functional and advantageous in the world of business and marketing as it leads soft and hard skills thrive. As a closing note, it might not be inaccurate to say that should academics and pedagogues highlight the importance of math in business, fewer investors and manufacturers would go broke.
In
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s competitive world, the rivalry is fierce in commerce which entails that business
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
should have specific characteristics to guarantee success.
Consequently
, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
considered that merchants
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
knowledge of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
math
have an edge over other traders. I completely concur with this notion and believe that arithmetic is beneficial in improving both soft and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, one predominant nuance which contributes to the merits of knowing mathematics is that it fosters soft
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
. To put it
differently
, arithmetic lays the foundation of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marketing
by giving entrepreneurs and manufacturers insight into strategic thinking, time-management, and effective communication
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
To
illustrate this,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
independent studies carried out in developed and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developing countries
indicate that those industrialists
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
have majored in mathematics benefit from higher levels of creative and critical thinking.
Besides
, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
were they proved to be wiser decision makers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
quicker problem solvers.

In addition
, mathematical intelligence is one of the numerous kinds of intelligence introduced by Gardner as a determining factor which enables individuals develop their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
.
That is
to say, even ordinary
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are keen on this subject are more efficient in keeping accounts and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marketing
. To give one
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
example, those undergraduates
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
pursue their tertiary education in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marketing
, financial and administrative management and accounting, should take
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
math
lessons in college and university.
As a result
, the tendency to integrate more hours of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
math
into the pupils' curriculum has
seemingly
been on an upward trajectory.

In conclusion
, regarding this belief that knowing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
math
can play a substantial role in helping traders strive for financial gains, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that possessing knowledge of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
math
can be both functional and advantageous in the world of business and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marketing
as it leads soft and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
thrive. As a closing note, it might not be inaccurate to say that should academics and pedagogues highlight the importance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
math
in business, fewer investors and manufacturers would go broke.
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IELTS essay To succeed in business, one needs to know math.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
326 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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