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To some people studying the past is the best to help young people function well in the modern world To what extent do you agree or disagree What other measures could be effective in helping young people to function well in the modern world v.1

To some people studying the past is the best to help young people function well in the modern world What other measures could be effective in helping young people to function well in the modern world v. 1
Nowadays, more and more educators focus on the history' s subject, because it can help the thinking of youngster become more mature than before. Some people think learning history is not a good method for teaching children' s behavior, yet I disagree this opinion because of the past event are the best course material in education. In this essay, I will discuss other ways of education in teaching young fellows' behavior, and conclude with my personal opinions. Firstly, Many educational experts think if juveniles did not learn the past events and knowledge, they might become an ignorant person. Moreover, when youngsters face different cultural shocks, they will know how to respect every ethnicity and culture. Therefore, most specialists believe the government should improve the historical knowledge of young people. A good idea would be to guide students to understand the authentic history by themselves, such as conducting historical drama and visiting the memorial museum. Through this process, they can deeply understand different the importance of past events. Another method of using the past to teach juveniles behavior is the government should hold many activities of history for communities. These activities can not only help youngsters enhance their knowledge but also improve some parent information. Furthermore, such process can also prevent folks from causing discrimination' s problems. Take an example, most Taiwanese do not know the black people' s history, so they sometimes make some mistakes of racial discrimination. Thus, I think causing these phenomena is the lack of historical education. To conclude, I strongly believe learning historical events or information can discipline children' s behavior and widen their horizons since understanding this knowledge can remind people not to make the same problems. Ultimately, I agree learning history is the most efficient way for improving young fellows' attitude and making them ripen.
Nowadays, more and more educators focus on the
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history&
#039; s subject,
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because
it can
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help
the thinking of youngster become more mature than
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before
.
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Some
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people
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think
learning
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history
is not a
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good
method for teaching
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children&
#039; s
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behavior
,
yet
I disagree this opinion
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because
of the
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past
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event
are the best course material in education. In this essay, I will discuss other ways of education in teaching young
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fellows&
#039;
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behavior
, and conclude with my personal opinions.

Firstly
,
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Many
educational experts
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think
if juveniles did not learn the
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past
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
and
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knowledge
, they might become an ignorant person.
Moreover
, when youngsters face
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
cultural shocks, they will know how to respect every ethnicity and culture.
Therefore
, most specialists believe the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
historical
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knowledge
of young
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people
. A
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good
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
would be to guide students to understand the authentic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
by themselves, such as conducting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
historical
drama and visiting the memorial museum. Through this process, they can
deeply
understand
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
the importance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
.

Another method of using the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
to teach juveniles
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behavior
is the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should hold
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
activities of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
for communities. These activities can not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
youngsters enhance their
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knowledge
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but
also
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improve
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some
parent information.
Furthermore
, such process can
also
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prevent
folks from causing
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discrimination&
#039; s problems. Take an example, most Taiwanese do not know the black
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people&
#039; s
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history
,
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so
they
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sometimes
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make
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some
mistakes of racial discrimination.
Thus
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
causing these phenomena is the lack of
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historical
education.

To conclude
, I
strongly
believe learning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
historical
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
or information can discipline
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children&
#039; s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
behavior
and widen their horizons since understanding this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
can remind
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
not to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the same problems.
Ultimately
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
learning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
is the most efficient way for improving young
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fellows&
#039; attitude and making them ripen.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
26Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay To some people studying the past is the best to help young people function well in the modern world What other measures could be effective in helping young people to function well in the modern world v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
301 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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